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Nailing the first impression

Now the days are getting longer, and the weather is heating up, it’s time to refresh your wardrobe and dating journey to ensure you’re ready for the multitude of dates heading your way this Spring. This Spring season is all about shedding the winter blues and stepping into a season full of bold colours, feminine silhouettes, clean lines, and exquisite tailoring.

Putting your best foot forward and nailing the first impression on the date is key to building your confidence, showing up as your best self and also landing a second date! But when it comes to what to wear on the first date, there are so many options out there that it can be overwhelming! Here’s a few tips to get you started.

For her

Ladies less is more. Always start by highlighting your best features. A woman’s decolletage is such a feminine feature and the best way to highlight that is by wearing an off-the-shoulder silk blouse. Think Adele Bardot neckline – sexy, bold but also sultry. Another component in achieving that put together look that is sure to grab attention for all the right reasons is finding the right colours for your skin tone. If you have a deeper olive tone to your skin focusing on pieces that are made up of jewel tones are key. Whereas for those with a lighter skin tone and lighter tones to the hair you want to opt for pastels! Wearing the right ensemble for the date in question can completely change the dynamic of the first initial meeting and a small compliment can turn into an ice breaker and set the tone of the evening ahead. 

It’s also important to remember that balance is key when picking out the perfect outfit. If you decide to go with trousers, make sure the fit is perfect and team it with something a little sexier on top, after all men are visual creatures and you want to add a touch of femininity to your look. For dress silhouettes, opt for a midi slip dress, paired with a very structured blazer or moto jacket, depending on the location of the date.

Don’t forget the small details too. For accessories, tie in a bold statement piece and keep everything else minimal. If you choose to wear fine jewellery, layer those dainty necklaces which adds more depth to your outfit. When it comes to footwear, wear a shoe that’s comfortable and in line with what you are doing on your date. For a traditional dinner and drinks date, opt for a strappy heel or pump which is still sexy but also sophisticated. 

For Him

Tailoring is key when it comes to a man’s ensemble. For the first date the idea is to look polished, which starts with making sure everything fits. Whether you are opting for a romantic dinner or casual drinks at a nice bar, wearing a sport coat with dark denim jeans which can be worn with a classic fitted white button up shirt, is always a classy and easy look to achieve. When it comes to denim jeans, always choose a dark, slim, straight cut as it’s the most flattering style for men, regardless of your size and body shape.

Depending on the occasion, you want to pair this look with a suede brown loafer or any neutral colour oxford shoe. To simplify the look for a more casual date, like a trip to the movies, opt for a fitted white tee instead of a white button up shirt. Always remember to choose an outfit based on the date in mind.

Don’t forget the rest of you! While you may have the outfit sorted, remember that women see everything so attention to detail and grooming is key to securing that second date!

If you’re single and looking to Spring clean your dating journey and try something new, then get in touch with our friendly team of experts today. Our matchmakers and dating experts are on hand to ensure that you are ready to start your dating journey on the right track.

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Why a pre-work date should be next in your diary

Are you a night owl – the type of person who feels much more focused and energetic in the evening? Or would you say you’re more of a lark – a morning person who prefers to be up at the crack of dawn? If it’s the latter, the latest dating trend might be just up your street. 

Dawn dating describes meeting with a prospective romantic partner when the day is young, and it’s fast becoming as popular as the more traditional evening dinner and drinks.

With around 51% of single people admitting they have been on a morning date recently and nearly three-quarters saying they’d be impressed to be invited to an early morning rendezvous, it seems people are quite literally seizing the day and meeting up, fresh-faced, for a date in the morning before the normal routine of the day starts. The benefits? Think less Chardonnay, more extra-shot lattes, and getting to know you strolls rather than making awkward small talk across the dining table.

Perhaps dawn dating is a trend you’ve already got plenty of experience with. After all, for a while the pandemic saw meeting up with a potential love interest being legally relegated to the outdoors. An informal stroll with a coffee in hand may have become a firm favourite as you eschew more pricey nights out. 

Even if early mornings aren’t usually your bag, there are plenty of benefits to setting your alarm an hour or two earlier for a date with a difference. 

Those aforementioned early risers might find their date is likeminded in their approach for seizing the day and getting things done before lunch. Quite often they will use the mornings to participate in hobbies and leisure activities and you may even find that you share a passion for early morning activities, whether it’s a run in the park, a fitness class or maybe even a spot of people watching over a coffee.

But even if that isn’t the case, there are many benefits to opting for a morning rather than evening for your next date. For starters, how often do you find that you go for a romantic meal somewhere and before you know it one glass of wine turns into sharing a bottle? Not adding alcohol to the mix allows for a clearer head and less worries about overdoing it – unless a bottomless brunch is on your agenda. You’ll be sure to remember a lot more of what you chatted about for future dates as well.

There’s also the added bonus of easing the endless diary juggling which goes hand-in-hand with a busy working life and competing demands for your evening time. Between work, family commitments and friends, it can often feel impossible to fit dating into your already hectic schedule. While it may seem nerve-wracking to meet in the morning, it can ease the pressure of committing to a longer date in the evening with somebody you’ve never met before. Clock-watching may not seem romantic, but it can help focus the date and add a natural endpoint when you both need to head off to other commitments.

Like everything, dawn dating, of course, might not be for everybody. Your morning routine may just be too hectic to fit in another activity. The worry of making it to work in time may be too much of a distraction to make the idea enjoyable. Or quite simply, you may miss the routine of taking your time getting ready for an evening out with a glass of wine to settle those pre-date jitters.

If you’re looking to mix it up a bit, or you want to break the cycle of rushing to a date in a post-work flurry, then maybe it’s worth giving an early morning meet-up a go. We predict as the weather warms up and the sunrise gets earlier, this trend will continue to grow, and those diaries will be just as full at the start of the day as they are in the evenings!

If you are single and looking for that special person that you just cannot wait to see, whatever time of day it is, then get in touch with our friendly team today. Our expert matchmakers are on-hand to offer help and guidance throughout your dating journey to help you find the perfect partner. 

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5 expectations that can hold you back when dating

When looking for love, it’s normal to have an idea of how you envision your partner and future relationship to be. But, at what point does the checklist become detrimental to your quest for love?

Unrealistic expectations are a common barrier that stop people from achieving dating success and most of the time people aren’t aware that they are doing it – until it’s pointed out to them. Here we explore some of the main reasons that stop relationships from developing into a successful long-term connection, and why it’s important to take a more laid-back approach in your dating journey.

Comparing your date to previous dates or relationships

You may have heard the saying ‘comparison is the thief of joy.’ Well, comparing your date with someone you’ve dated or had a relationship with in the past will set both of you up to fail and will ensure you find reasons not to go out on a date with them again. It’s not uncommon to look for certain physical and personality traits that you find attractive when you’re dating, and although it would be amazing if we could take the best parts from every date we’ve ever had and mould them into the perfect partner, it’s just not realistic. Try to remember that everyone is unique, with their own set of experiences and beliefs. Instead of comparing and focusing on the parts that don’t match up to your past partners, it’s important to try to pay attention to the person’s positive qualities. After all, an ex is an ex for a reason and who knows those differences could be the qualities that you’ve been missing and the answer in your search for that perfect partner for you.

Only dating your usual ‘type’

With the huge array of dating apps and websites at your disposal that allow filtering by personal and physical traits, being selective has never been easier. However, restricting your preferences could stop you meeting that perfect partner – you simply don’t know who you are going to connect with. Dating a certain ‘type’ can be very limiting and realistically if it hasn’t worked before what makes you think it will work now? Try to stay open-minded and give people a chance. They may not tick all of your usual boxes, but don’t automatically write them off as someone you won’t be interested in. What have you got to lose? You may just find the love of your life in that person you initially discounted.

Expecting your date to make the arrangements and pay for everything

Traditionally, the man would ask a girl out, plan their first date and pick up the tab. However, when it comes to modern dating there are no set rules and it is totally dependent upon each couple. Deciding together on where to go on your date can be fun and sets the tone for a more equal relationship moving forward. Dating is about getting to know someone and learning to make decisions together, so discussing ideas and learning about each others’ preferences ensures you both enjoy yourself on the date. However, when it comes to who should pay, it can be an awkward moment – especially if you’ve not discussed it beforehand. Usually, whoever invited the other person out and chose the venue should pay for the date. However, if the date and location was a mutual decision, it’s always good to split the bill. We’re not in the dark ages anymore, so as a rule of thumb always offer to pay half and be genuine about your offer.

Expecting too much from the relationship
Having expectations about how your relationship should develop or how your partner should treat you is a good thing. However, expecting much more than the other person is ready or prepared to give can lead to you feeling needy, disappointed and alone. For instance, you may want to spend every spare moment with your significant other or you may always expect them to plan your next date night. Whatever your expectations, if you’re finding yourself feeling let down and unfulfilled, try to have a conversation about how you both feel and remember that everyone’s needs and expectations in a relationship are different. When you are able to discuss this openly and honestly you will begin to understand your differences and in turn, you are then able to make compromises and come together with similar expectations ensuring that both of your needs are met.

Expecting things to move faster or slower in a new relationship

Many people struggle to find the right speed in a relationship and question if they’re moving too fast or too slow. There’s no perfect speed with which to move forward in a relationship but if you’ve already created your wedding pinterest board after date two, you may want to slow down a bit. Again, communication is key here. You may find that you have different expectations on how quickly your relationship should develop but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not a good match. Ensure that you and your date are on the same page and take the time to discuss expectations. If you are in two different life phases and anticipating different levels of commitment, it’s better to know from the beginning before growing close to one another. Rather than having a set timeline in mind for your relationship, focus on having a good time and enjoying the other person’s company and see where things go naturally.

If you’re single and looking for a new way to date that manages your expectations so you can find that successful, long-term relationship that you’re searching for, then get in touch with our friendly team of expert matchmakers today to find out more about how they can support you on your dating journey and set you up for success.

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The value of trust: why choosing the right agency is crucial to your journey

Navigating the dating landscape can be tricky, especially without the specialist knowledge and insight from industry professionals. But thankfully, there are plenty of experts and agencies out there just waiting to help and guide you in the right direction.

But often that can be another challenge in itself. So how do you figure out who or where is the best fit for your journey?

Here are some considerations when choosing the right experts to help you in your search for love.

Credibility

It’s really important that anyone who is guiding you on this often-vulnerable journey is reputable and has the correct experience. Be sure to conduct your own due diligence and research on a company or an individual before putting your trust in them. If they are reputable and experienced there should be plenty of reviews, ratings, and references available to you which will indicate the level and quality of their work. Awards and accreditations are also a sign of a high-standard, legitimate, and quality agency or individual.

At Ignite Dating we pride ourselves on the quality of our services and going above and beyond the industry-standard to provide a dating journey that leaves clients feeling confident, energised and importantly, safe. It is no surprise then, that as a company we invest in the best available training for our matchmakers and why we are the only matchmaking agency in the UK that’s full team of matchmakers has undergone training and received accreditation from the Matchmaking Institute – the world’s only organisation authorised to issue certification in the field of matchmaking.

Not only that, but we also have several award recognitions under its built including the recently announced Dating Agency of the Year – South West award at the Prestige Awards. These achievements are not only great for us to achieve, but recognition like this can give you a much-deeper insight into the way that the agency works and help you determine whether they really have your best interests at heart.

Compatibility

Your relationship with your matchmaker is equally as important as the romantic relationship that you’re seeking out; if you’re not comfortable being open and honest with them, then they’re probably not the right matchmaker for you.

To get the most out of the service it’s important to work with someone who you can really resonate with, and you feel understands your needs. You will be working very closely with this individual, so you need to be confident that they understand criteria that are most important to you and have the passion to help and support you on your journey.

Be sure to interview your matchmaker as much as they interview you; what can they offer you? Are they listening to you? Do they have the necessary experience, skills, accreditation, and network to help you? 

At Ignite Dating, each client is assigned their own dedicated matchmaker who will introduce them to hand-selected introductions that have values, aspirations and a lifestyle that align with their own. We invest time working with clients to get them to the right place, so they have the confidence to start dating and can recognise when the right person is in front of them.

Your matchmaker is on hand to offer support and guidance throughout your entire dating adventure, so it’s imperative that you have the right relationship with your matchmaker and that they resonate with your own personal beliefs and values before you start on that quest for love.

With hundreds of hours and thousands of pounds invested by single people looking for their ideal partner online, not to mention the resilience that you need, going it alone can actually be much harder, and more expensive than you think. But it isn’t your only option.

If you’ve found an agency that you can be open and honest with, who understands who you are and what you are looking for and comes with an array of experience, testimonials, and accolades that back up their claims, then it sounds like they could be the right agency for you.

Finding the right matchmaker or dating coach can be half the battle.

So instead of spending yet more money, time and attention aimlessly searching for that special person, why not let the experts’ put things into focus and help you find that perfect partner you’ve been searching for. You may be surprised by how much quicker your journey can be once you’ve put your faith and trust in the professionals.

If you want to find out more about Ignite Dating and its award-winning service, then get in touch with our friendly team today and let our expert matchmakers put you on the right track to success.

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Avoiding The Tinder Swindlers

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last few weeks, you have probably already heard about Tinder Swindler, the trending Netflix true crime documentary. If you haven’t watched it yet, it’s a must see, especially if you are a single lady looking for love online.

This gripping documentary tells the story of how 31-year-old Simon Leviev conned woman around the globe out of thousands of pounds, via credit cards and loans, leaving them with crippling amounts of debt. Despite the luxurious lifestyle and endless possibilities portrayed, it highlights how online dating can go wrong, very quickly.

Fast cars, luxury brands, enviable locations, and private jets – Simon Leviev’s life appeared to be one of a hugely successful businessman. Falsely claiming to be the ‘Prince of Diamonds’, the son of a Russian-Israeli billionaire and diamond mogul, Simon seduced his victims with his extravagant, lavish lifestyle, gaining their trust and love, before deceiving them out of their money. Contrary to the persona portrayed, in reality, Simon’s real name is Shimon Yehuda Hayut, an Israeli conman convicted of theft, forgery and fraud going back several years.

After Simon’s victims made the regrettable decision to swipe right, they were duped into falling for him through his use of clever stories, convincing videos, and continuous lies to manipulate, persuade and exploit them. He would shower the women with lavish trips and gifts, which were all paid for by his other unsuspecting victims. He’d then ask for more and more money under the guise of needing to protect his identity due to security concerns and stating that enemies were ‘out to get him’.

Romance fraudsters are usually patient and often groom victims for many months, building a relationship and establishing trust, before attempting to steal their money. Conveying themselves as vulnerable and in need of help, these callous individuals often claim to have a job that requires long periods of travel to explain the long time lapses between contact – they may pretend that they are in the armed forces or are an offshore oil-rig worker for instance. After months of grooming, they will then ask for help financially, whether it’s an issue with a visa, health problems or simply getting a flight home to them.

Unfortunately, these stories are no longer few and far between.

In the first half of 2021 alone, over £15 million was lost to romance scams. Two in five people who dated someone they met online in the last year said they were asked to give or lend money, despite having never met in-person. Of those that were asked to give or lend money by someone they met online, over half did so – putting them at risk of being a victim of a romance scam.

However, the good news is that there is a better and safer way to meet that special person, without the need for an online presence. Matchmakers and introduction agencies are fast becoming the option of choice for successful professionals across the UK and it’s easy to see why. There is no need to have an online presence or spend time writing a profile or uploading photos to a website. Instead, an experienced and professional matchmaker will do all the hard work for you to get you dating ready.

Providing a safer experience with ID-checked introductions, most matchmaking agencies will also carry out other checks on clients including looking into their digital footprint to ensure that any individuals are legitimate and who they say they are, to offer a safer and more secure dating journey for their clients.

Taking the guesswork out of hours of scrolling through profiles online and making polite conversation with potential dates, your matchmaker will get to work sourcing and selecting the right introductions for you – so you can sit back, relax, and wait for genuine introductions to be brought to you knowing that each and every one has the potential to be that perfect partner you’ve been searching for.

If you are single and looking for a safer way to date, then get in touch with our friendly team today and find out how we can help you find genuine and honest connections with single people who share the same aspirations, values and lifestyle as you.

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Seven deadly sins of dating: how important is intelligence really?

Maybe it’s the boom of online dating and the necessity to have a checklist or the fact that more and more of us are heading to university each year, but the education level of a partner seems to be playing a dominant role in the criteria of successful, single professionals in recent years.

More recently, nearly 70% of people admit that it’s important or very important to be intellectually challenged by a romantic partner. A trend that seems to be more highly valued amongst millennials than any other generation. But why have we become so focused on education?

While men aren’t so focused on education levels, for many women who are educated to degree level and beyond, finding a partner that has similar credentials when it comes to education status is significant. For the most part, women find it easier to connect with a partner who has a similar knowledge base and has shared comparable experiences. While that may make sense for the most part, particularly if intelligent and stimulating conversation is an attribute that you admire most in a person, there is one major flaw that is being overlooked.

The problem. The ratio of degree educated men to women in life – not just on dating sites or through agencies – just doesn’t add up. In the UK alone, nearly 67,000 more women enrol in further education than men. Put simply, there aren’t enough degree educated men to go around!

Women are more highly educated than ever before and the reason that many women can’t find a partner with similar qualifications is because they simply don’t exist. But life experiences and success go far beyond sitting in a university lecture hall. And people like Bill Gates, Richard Branson, Steve Jobs, Walt Disney and many more are testament to that.

When we meet people organically, where someone went to school or the qualification they have, are often irrelevant and questions saved for job interviews, not dates. The reason being is that fundamentally, we don’t really care. In fact, it’s usually something that comes up after a connection has been formed with that person and at that stage bears very little impact on the way you see them or feel about them. Realistically, are you going to end a great relationship over the fact that six months in you find out that they failed university or dropped out of school – honestly the answer is no. We have also discovered that men who fall into the ultra-high net worth category are usually business savvy, rather than academic, with many of them leaving school with no formal qualifications at all. Would the missing piece of paper with a set of numbers on really be a hurdle to meeting a successful man who could be your perfect match?

While the checklist culture of online dating has led us to believe that education is an important attribute to measure whether you move forward with a proposed match, it’s crucial to recognise that it may just be a barrier you’re putting in place – and one that statistically speaking is unlikely to come to fruition for many people.

Next time you’re looking over a profile and everything else lines up but the education level, stop and remember the household names that we mentioned above. Success comes in all different forms, and you may even find that whether they attended university or not, the life experiences that they have and the intellect that they channel, might be more aligned than you ever could have imagined.

So, let’s leave the education questions to the interview boardroom where they belong!

If you’re single and looking for a new way to date that focuses on the things that really matter, then get in touch with our expert team of matchmakers today. With their expert knowledge and extensive experience, they can guide you away from the barriers you’ve been relying on and open your journey to the relationship that you truly deserve.

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Seven deadly sins of dating: why wealth doesn’t guarantee relationship success

It’s a topic that sparks controversy when it comes to dating. Whether you’re the breadwinner in the relationship or your partner is, the financial standing of your cash and asset wealth is often an element of scrutiny when picking a partner. But what is it about financial status that makes us value the materialistic over the realistic when it comes to ideal attributes?

From the moment you start dating, socioeconomic status plays a role. And while the necessity for it may have changed over the years, there is no denying that when it comes to dating the wealth that you have could influence the type of partner you attract.

Looking back through history, women used to have to marry for money. With limited ways to make their own living and at times, no legal ability to hold and inherit property themselves, partnering up with a wealthy man could be the only way to find financial security. But despite society evolving and women becoming more educated and qualified and ultimately able to earn their own money and invest in their own assets, women are still four times more likely to focus on salary when considering a partner, than their male counterparts. But contrary to popular belief, financial compatibility does not mean you need to go looking for a partner with the same financial standing as yourself – it goes much deeper than that.

Money has long been known to be a leading cause of stress in relationships. Probably because, for the most part, it is a topic that we don’t talk about. Whether you’re new to the relationship and you’re scared to approach the subject for fear that bringing up something ‘real’ will put a dampener on the fun that you are having or maybe you’re in a long-term relationship and you’ve never considered discussing the finances with your partner as everything always seems to have a way of working itself out, not talking about money could become a sticking point in the success of your relationship.

After all, money is going to impact any choices that you and your partner decide to make in the future. From buying a house, to having children, going on holiday to plans to retire, all of these milestones in your relationship require a considerable amount of financial planning, and if you aren’t on the same page when it comes to how you spend your money it’s going to cause some major problems further down the road.

That said, financial compatibility isn’t about finding someone with the same financial standing as you or declining a perfectly good match simply because they don’t earn enough money. It’s about finding a partner who shares your attitude and habits surrounding money. How many times have you heard stories about wealthy businessmen or women who go bankrupt in the blink of an eye and have to start all over again, or people that earn a moderate wage but then work hard and become financially stable just a few years later – our guess, a lot.

So, next time you’re looking at someone’s profile or you’re having a drink with a potential partner, listen to where their priorities lie. The way somebody talks about and acts with their money can give you a much better insight into your compatibility than the numbers on their wage slip or the properties in their portfolio ever will.

After all, money can’t buy happiness.

Finding that perfect partner can be a chore, but it doesn’t have to be. With expert matchmakers and in-depth knowledge on your side, you can completely change the success of your dating journey and come to realise the things that really matter to you. Get in touch with our friendly team today to find out how they can make your plans a reality.

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Seven deadly sins of dating: to marry or not to marry

What is the ultimate goal when it comes to a relationship? The one thing that you want to achieve above all else. Well, depending on who you ask the answers will differ. But despite that, society’s stereotypes still have us believing that when it comes to love and romance, marriage is the only deciding factor that counts when it comes to how ‘real’ your relationship is.

But with marriage rates declining, isn’t it about time that the stereotypes portrayed in TV shows, movies, literature and even in real life, caught up with the reality that not every couple wants to get married – and that it doesn’t make their commitment any less real.

While we may be hopeless romantics at Ignite Dating and swoon over stories of proposals and photos of brides and grooms looking happy and loved up as they take that first step into their new lives together, we are also realists that recognise that measuring relationship success is as unique to each couple as the journey it took to get there.

To marry or not to marry is a personal choice, but just like the other deadly sins we talked about it isn’t set in stone. Sometimes it just takes meeting the right person for your standpoint on marriage to completely turnaround. And certain activities in a relationship can increase the chances of that proposal happening, regardless of your feelings towards marriage beforehand.

When you first start dating, a bond starts to form between you and your prospective partner as you get to know each other better. As you navigate that relationship and enjoy rituals together, whether it’s celebrating a birthday, going on holiday or simply a Friday night movie marathon, you get to witness behaviour and interactions that might indicate where the relationship is going.    

Research has shown that a couple’s commitment to get married can increase or decrease depending on the nature of the interactions that they have between them. While you may think those routine dinners and snuggling up with a movie on the couch are just part and parcel of everyday life in your relationship, they could actually be the key to determining the success of your future together. After all, rituals can reinforce bonds and strengthen commitment, but they can also showcase conflict areas and make people less likely to see the relationship heading towards marriage. In short, they force us to slow down and take a better look at the relationship and who you are as a couple.

When it comes to somebody’s viewpoint on marriage, it is usually determined by their own experiences and the opinions of those close to them, such as their parent’s marriage, previous relationships and even the relationships that their friends have. But that doesn’t mean that it can’t change over time.

We have seen it happen multiple times, where somebody has said that marriage is not something that they’re interested in, only to go ahead and find the woman or man of their dreams and take a walk up the aisle. Don’t rule out somebody who isn’t prioritising marriage right now, but instead remember that they haven’t met you yet and for all you know, you could be that person who completely changes the game for them.

And if on the other side of it, you have a great relationship, you’re committed and loyal to each other and make the decision that marriage isn’t for you, then that’s ok too. Every love story and relationship is different, so don’t try to mould yourself to what everybody expects you to be as a couple and instead enjoy the moments that you share together – after all, that’s all that really matters.

If you’re single and looking for a relationship that is fulfilling, committed and based on the traits and qualities that matter most, then get in touch with our friendly team today. With their expert advice and support, they can guide you away from the barriers that you’re subconsciously putting into place and open your eyes to a completely new way of dating. 

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Seven deadly sins of dating: why men prefer slim women

When it comes to physical appearance and attractiveness in a partner some things will never change – no matter how much we evolve. And none more so, than the commonly debated topic of body types.

Just as women tend to place more importance on their partner’s height, men put more emphasis on their partner’s shape. But why?

It’s an everyday scene amongst couples; a gentleman with a slim, attractive partner. But what is it about the average to curvy physique that causes such a sticking point when choosing the right life partner? Historically, when choosing a mate, a man would opt for a woman with a body fat percentage of 30%, which for today would be deemed a curvaceous figure.

The reason being women with a higher fat percentage were perceived to be a better prospect for the role of a mother, but the crucial point came as to where the fat was situated on her body, with the most attractive being the hips and thighs and not the waist.

However, as time went on the definition of fitness changed too. Fitness in evolutionary terms comprises of two things; survival and the ability to reproduce. A BMI of between 17 and 20 corresponds to the average BMI of someone aged 18-20 with maximal fertility and minimal risk of future disease. So evolutionarily speaking, the reason that men find slimness in females so attractive is because they equate it with youth. Even if they do not want more children, it’s in their subconscious. 

That said, there is such a thing as too skinny. You will rarely find a man pawing over a copy of vogue or watching fashion shows and scouting out the ultra-skinny models. Instead, they are more likely to be looking for a relatively slim physique coupled with that highly admired hourglass figure.

Of course, whether someone prefers a partner who is taller or heavier can vary depending on how tall or heavy that person is themselves, but ultimately just like body types there is no one size fits all.

Having a low BMI, while it may lower the risks of certain health issues such as diabetes and heart disease, it doesn’t guarantee that you are going to be free from disease later in life or able to have children. There are stories galore of slim women that have trouble to conceive or struggle with health issues, just like there are stories of more curvaceous women who have no problem living fit and healthy lives as a mother.

So, let’s start looking at body types and weight as just what they are. A figure that is not static. As we get older our body types change thanks in no small part to hormones, lifestyle changes, dietary requirements, and life stages. The chances are while your dream partner may be a petite size 6 now, 20 years down the line will they look the same? Our guess is probably not.

Next time you’re looking at a profile, disregard the photo completely. Instead, look at what it really says about the person, their values, their aspirations, their lifestyle, and their outlook on life. These are the things that will tell you all you need to know about the person and will give you far more insight into the compatibility of a relationship than a number on the scales ever will.

If you are single and looking for a more holistic way to date, then get in touch with our friendly team of expert matchmakers today. With their ongoing guidance and support, you’ll realise the things that really matter to you and find that your dating journey is far more successful with your eyes wide open.

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The seven deadly sins of dating: why women prefer tall men

It’s a common sight amongst couples; a tall gentleman walking down the street holding hands with a lady shorter than him. But what is it about height that seems to cause such a stir when choosing the right partner?

Looking back through evolution, it can be argued that women preferred to partner up with a taller man as they were deemed stronger and more capable of fighting off physical threats towards his family. But despite humanity becoming more civilised over the centuries and physical threats at a minimum, that idea of a taller gentleman being a better mate seems to remain.

History has shown that there is something appealing about taller men. From TV shows to movies and even in real life, men in successful positions (whether Company Directors or Prime Ministers) are more likely to be of a grander stature than their colleagues.

And it seems there is a psychological explanation for this. Their leadership abilities may lie in the fact that generally, taller men have higher self-esteem, are happier and less likely to feel jealous or insecure around other men. As a result, women tend to gravitate towards men over 6ft tall, believing that they are more successful and secure than their counterparts.

But with the average height of a UK man being 5ft 9”, where does that leave our shorter counterparts today?

Firstly, height is just a number. If you think about it logically, being tall doesn’t necessarily mean you are stronger, smarter, or more successful. It also doesn’t guarantee that your relationship is going to be any more long-lasting than if you were to date a gentleman who was three inches shorter. The only certainty it offers is that you are dating a gentleman who is taller than you – and really in the grand scheme of life that isn’t anything to write home about!

Secondly, if you take a moment to stop and think about the things that are really important to you, where would height come into it? Our guess (and from proven experience) when everything else aligns such as values, aspirations, lifestyle, those lack of inches are not as vital as first perceived to be.

After all, would you rather have a gentleman who is the same height or slightly taller than you but who loves you, supports you, works with you towards your shared goals and is respectful and loving or someone who doesn’t share much in the way of values and aspirations but who is that perceived perfect height of 6ft plus?

Obviously, the answer is a no brainer!

So next time you’re looking over a profile and you catch sight of their height, ignore it. Instead look at the things that really matter; the kind of person they are, the dreams they wish to achieve in the future and envision how you fit into their storyline. We can promise you, only then, will you achieve a more fulfilling and stronger relationship.

If you are single and looking for a way to declutter that checklist and concentrate on the important things, then get in touch with our friendly team today. Our expert matchmakers are on hand to bring clarity to your dating journey and open up your expectations to allow that perfect partner to walk into your life and enjoy a happily ever after together.