Why marriage after online dating could spell divorce

When it comes to the search for true love, everyone dreams of that happily ever after. Whether you meet online, through friends or enlist the help of a matchmaking agency, a life-long partner who shares your values, aspirations and lifestyle is the ultimate goal. But is there a way to help determine the long-term success of the relationship before it starts?

The honest answer is no. After all, every person is different with their own unique experiences, traits, attachment styles and outlooks. However, statistically speaking the way that you meet your partner could shine a little light on the long-term success of the relationship.  

Algorithms don’t always equal success

When online dating was the new kid on the block, there was a huge flurry of success stories. From friends to colleagues and even parents, everyone seemed to be meeting online and finding success. But fast forward to today and the number of successes seem to be dwindling, replaced with stories of scams and nightmare dates.

When you’re looking for a long-term partner, someone you can share a genuine connection with, dating apps can be a real let down. Using sparse databases, loosely fitting criteria and vague algorithms to help you find your match, online dating takes the human element out of the matching process and reinforces the need for luck. And lots of it!

And that’s not all. A recent study by the Marriage Foundation found that couples who met and started a relationship through an online dating app or website are six times more likely to get divorced in the first three years of marriage than those who met more organically through people they know and trust.

Once the shock of the statistic sinks in and you really think about it, it’s understandable why this might be the case.

From complete strangers to relative strangers

Often when couples meet online, they are doing so as complete strangers. They have no mutual friends and no shared experiences, making the gathering of reliable information about the long-term character of the person you are dating or marrying quite difficult. Add to this the fact that the wider social connections between families and friends must form from scratch, compared to those that have been established for years and even decades in some cases, and you are already at a disadvantage and at risk of making a hasty mistake.

It takes approximately two years minimum to really get to know someone. The first year, the relationship is new. You both work hard on continuing to impress each other and showcase why you are a good match and the idea of what the relationship could be like in the future.

Then, as time goes by and you spend more time together, their traits and behaviours will start to show more. When you get closer to the second year, you’ll notice patterns occurring in their behaviour, little quirks that at first seemed quite small but over time seem to grow bigger and bigger. This is usually when you hit the fight or flight period in the relationship.

It is during this stage that you evaluate your relationship. You will reflect on their character traits and determine whether they are small enough for you to accept and move forward into the next phase of the relationship or whether it is time to pull the plug.

Unfortunately, according to the statistics a large portion of those opt for the latter.

Can you increase your chances of happily ever after?

With everything in life, there are no certainties. No agency or dating app can guarantee that you will find love and live happily ever after but there are ways to increase your chances.

If finding someone organically through your family, friendship or social circles is a no go, turning to an elite matchmaking agency may be a much more effective way to find true love. From the moment that you join, an expert matchmaker will guide you through every step of your journey. They will spend time getting to know who you are and what is important to you in a partner before writing your profile and searching for that special person.  

Unlike database matching agencies and online apps, they don’t rely on algorithms to find the perfect match. Instead, they use intuition, expertise and that all important human touch to find a life partner that shares the same values, aspirations and lifestyle as you. By taking the time to understand what you are looking for and ensuring that you have the necessary support around you to embark on your dating journey, you are more likely to achieve that ultimate goal of a long-term committed relationship.

If you are single and looking for a more effective way to date, then get in touch with our friendly team of expert matchmakers who are ready to help you take that first step to success today.

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