Sadly, it’s a situation most of us have found ourselves in – some of us many times over. The break-up of a relationship can be devastating, leaving you feeling heartbroken and struggling to imagine what life will look like without that all-important person in it. It can be irrelevant whether you initiated the split, whether the decision was mutual, or if the other person called time on the relationship. Going your separate ways can be extremely tough and it can take a long time to recover from the impact of a relationship ending.
Break-ups can be incredibly painful and there is no right or wrong way to deal with a heart-breaking split. However, there are some predictable stages to a breakup, which are often likened to the stages of grief you experience as you mourn a death. These include denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally, acceptance.
However, breaking up is not necessarily a linear process so it’s not unusual to bounce around between these stages, experiencing them out of order or not encountering them at all. You may have experienced first-hand the agonising disbelief that a relationship is over, which can lead to resorting to bargaining tactics in a bid to attempt to salvage the relationship. Unfortunately, this rarely works. Anger may manifest in many ways, whether it’s directed at your ex, external factors involved in the breakup, or even friends that want to maintain a relationship with both of you rather than taking sides. Many of us will recognise the huge sadness that accompany a breakup, which can take a toll on your body and make every day feel like an emotional rollercoaster. However, these negative feelings will eventually pass, and you will, in time, make peace with the situation.
Although it can feel like the pain will never end, there are ways to help get over a painful split. Here are our top tips to help you if you are finding it hard to move on from a relationship which has come to a sad end.
Don’t forget your support network
While it can be all-too tempting to curl up into a ball and shut out the world, it’s important to make sure you let your friends and family support you at this difficult time. Your nearest and dearest can offer a fresh perspective on the split and be there for you when you are struggling, providing a valuable distraction.
Beware of romanticising
It can be tempting to have a rose-tinted view of your time together when you are mourning the loss of a relationship, and this can easily lead you to forgetting to factor in the bad parts. Being realistic about what wasn’t great about the relationship helps you strengthen your resolve that it was ultimately the right choice to call it a day, no matter who initiated the breakup.
Focus on you
Elements of your character can get lost in the things you liked to do as a couple – perhaps you loved watching horror movies, but your partner wasn’t a fan. Rediscovering old interests is a great way of re-establishing your identity outside of the partnership.
It can be tempting to try and maintain a connection with an ex, but this can ultimately prolong the pain. A clean break can be the best way forward for healing and moving on.
Look to the future
Don’t see the time spent in the relationship as wasted, as you can learn a lot from your experience and the time you spent together which will help you decide what you really want from your next relationship. When the time is right, you’ll be in a much better place to move on and meet somebody you’ll truly have a fantastic connection with.
Work with the experts
Although it can be hard to believe, in time you will move on from your ex and get over them for good. And when you feel it is the right time to meet somebody new, it can really help to have support and advice of a trusted individual, so you aren’t facing a search for love alone. This is where our matchmakers come in, offering their expertise and extensive private network to help you easily find great people you’ll really share a spark with. Our matchmakers act like a trusted friend, being on-hand to offer advice every step of the way. This support is invaluable if you’ve experienced a particularly bad break-up and empowers you to focus on what you really want out of your next relationship. All you need to do is leave it to the experts and get out there again to enjoy some truly exciting dates!
Are you keen to hear more about the matchmaking process and how Ignite Dating can help you with your dating journey? Just give our expert team a call today and we’ll happily detail more about how our multiple award-winning service works!