You have a successful career, financial independence, an active social life and plenty of exciting experiences. On paper, you’re the full package, and yet, you still haven’t found the right person to share this with.
Despite what many think, being confident, successful and outgoing doesn’t guarantee that dating will be easier. In fact, many high-achieving women find the opposite can be true.
But don’t for one moment think that your success is the issue here. You’ve simply not found the dating strategy that’s right for you.
Though dating apps are often seen as the most accessible way to find love, they aren’t designed to assess what actually makes someone a great partner and more often than not, they lead to endless scrolling, pointless conversations and disappointing dates.
Well, we’re here to explain why dating apps aren’t working for successful women and how using a professional matchmaking service could be the answer to your dating troubles.
Dating apps optimise for attraction, not compatibility
Dating apps encourage people to make quick decisions about someone based on their photographs and basic information like age, height and a short bio. But long-term compatibility requires a far deeper connection. It goes beyond these arbitrary factors and should consider your:
- Emotional availability and intelligence
- Values
- Communication style
- Lifestyle
- Relationship goals
- Capacity for commitment
You need to know far more about a person than a dating profile can show you, and the last thing you want to do is spend days, even weeks, talking to someone because you liked their pictures, only to find out there’s nothing more to it than surface-level attraction.
More choice doesn’t necessarily mean better choice
We often think that more choice means better choices, but that is simply not true. In reality, swipe culture might mean more options, but it also means more filtering, more conversations, more dates and ultimately, more disappointment.
When it comes to dating apps, the problem isn’t a lack of choice. It’s a lack of meaningful filtering, and that’s where professional matchmaking services can be really valuable.
Your dedicated matchmaker will take on this part of the process, getting to know you on a deeper level so they can introduce you to matches with real potential.
Algorithms can’t understand everything that matters to you
Some of the most important elements of compatibility are difficult to reduce to a profile or preference filter, and no matter how sophisticated a dating app claims to be, the algorithm can’t understand everything that matters to you in the same way a human can.
Yes, you can set out a few of your hobbies, your preferences, job title and your age, but this can only go so far.
For example, two people can tick every box on paper, and their profiles could seem like a great match, but in the real world, they have no emotional connection.
Conversely, someone who doesn’t initially look like your “type” from their profile can turn out to be an exceptional partner with whom you have a lot in common.
When you use a professional matchmaking service like Ignite Dating, your expert matchmaker will combine personality profiling, intuition, years of experience and access to a private network of people not online to increase your chances of finding the right match.
This is a huge part of finding the right partner and is something that dating apps simply cannot match.
Success can make you more selective
Successful women are more likely to know themselves well, and this can make them more selective. And rightly so!
If you’ve spent years building a life that you’re proud of and genuinely happy with, you’re unlikely to want a relationship simply for the sake of being in one. You want someone who will fit nicely into your existing life and add to it in a meaningful way.
This does not mean you are being “fussy” or “too picky”. It means you know what you want and what is non-negotiable in a partner.
What’s more, high-achieving women may understandably look for a man who is equally as ambitious, intelligent, emotionally mature and financially secure.
This doesn’t mean the right partner has to mirror your every achievement, but they need to match your values and complement your lifestyle. They must possess the qualities you look for in an ideal partner.
High-achievers are often used to being in control
Successful people are generally used to making important decisions, assessing risks, solving problems and taking responsibility. And these are fantastic professional qualities.
But dating, particularly when using dating apps, doesn’t always respond well to the same approach.
You can’t project-manage chemistry or interview someone into being your partner, and you can’t always make a relationship work through effort alone.
Finding love requires a different mindset from building a career, and this can be hard to let go of when that is your default approach to the biggest and most important areas of your life.
You’ve spent too much time on the wrong people
Though you might not have considered it this way, a dating app can be like another job. You’ve got to search, swipe, message, talk, set up a date, attend, follow up, analyse and repeat.
For someone with a demanding career or busy schedule, that’s a huge opportunity cost and can be very time-consuming. And even when the date is pleasant, the person might be emotionally unavailable, looking for something casual or incompatible with your lifestyle.
So the problem isn’t just that dating apps take too much time; it’s that they ask you to invest your time in them and the people you subsequently meet, before you have any real idea if this person is compatible with you and your lifestyle.
Why use a professional matchmaking service instead
If you’re bored of the endless swiping and trying to determine if someone is relationship-worthy from a 30-word bio, a professional matchmaking service could be the solution for you.
Before taking on the search for you, a matchmaker will consider your:
- Life stage
- Values and goals
- Lifestyle
- Ambitions
- Emotional maturity and availability
- Personality
- Patterns in previous relationships
Armed with all this information, they can search their network for matches they believe will not only fit into your life but enhance it. They will also help you to challenge your assumptions rather than simply going for the same type you always have.
That’s why you should work with a professional matchmaking service like Ignite Dating.
Are you looking for love right now?
If you’re bored of swiping or trying to squeeze in dates whenever you get a spare second, we can help.
Get in touch with the team at Ignite Dating to find out more about our professional matchmaking services and how we can make you as successful in your dating life as you are in your professional one. We look forward to hearing from you.
