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How to let the real you shine through on dates

Do you ever feel like everybody is a little more chilled out than you when it comes to dating? That by letting yourself get tied up in knots with pre-date nerves, you are somehow unusual? Well, you’re not alone. It’s normal to experience first date nerves – from the gentlest of flutters as you arrive at the venue, to feeling overwhelmed by the idea of making small talk with someone you’ve never met before – the key is not letting it overpower the real you.

Unfortunately, with nerves comes the tendency to clam up and not be yourself. We’ve all heard numerous dating disaster anecdotes about the time somebody tripped/forgot their date’s name/had a tumbleweed moment with a poorly received joke (insert your own nerve-induced calamity here). Which, when you come to think about it, just serves to make you even more nervous as you prepare for your own first date.

Nerves aside though, there is also a danger you may inadvertently adapt your behaviour, subconsciously or not, to act in a way which you believe your date would want you to.

More than half of people surveyed in a recent study said they behave differently and less authentically to fit into perceived gender expectations about how they should act on a date. Women in particular, admitted that they are conscious of behaviours thought to be off-putting to men including appearing too clingy, being too forward or coming across as genuinely interested. The study found more than a third of women effectively dull their own shine to make their male dates feel more comfortable and powerful during the date.   

All this pressure can lead to putting on a façade during a first date – but by doing so your date is missing out on discovering your best side. While it can be very tricky to shed the nerves and the pre-conceived ideas of how you should be acting on a date, by relaxing and being yourself you can let the real you shine through. While there is a certain amount of formality which comes with first dates, putting your best foot forward and looking ahead to the future will be so much easier if you are being authentic.

We’ve shared our top tips for making sure your true character takes centre stage when you go on a first date so you can feel confident you are doing yourself justice – and your date gets to know the real, amazing you.

Manage your inner voice

We can all be our harshest critics but it’s important to pay attention to how your inner voice is treating you. Are you being overly critical of how you may be coming across on dates? Becoming hung up on how you look, or getting paranoid your small talk is sub-par? Then it’s time to talk yourself up, reminding yourself how awesome and worthy you really are. If you find this tough, then it can be handy to put little notes around at home reminding you of your positive traits, making sure they counter the negative thoughts you may have been experiencing.

Create an enjoyable pre-date ritual

It always pays to be prepared and it’s no different when it comes to dating. Find something that works for you that soothes your nerves, whether it’s meditation, cranking up your favourite feel-good playlist or just taking the time to visualise how the date might go, preparing yourself for all eventualities. Even making sure you know exactly where you are going and how you’ll get there minimises the risk of you arriving flustered and late. Whether it’s any of the above or simply a quick glass of wine before you leave or chatting with friends for some last-minute good luck vibes – whatever works to help you feel comfortable and relaxed pre-date will follow through into the actual event.

Be honest

Try to avoid the temptation to act like you’re more into your date’s hobbies and interests than you really are. It’s just trouble waiting to happen if you feign an interest in something you’re just not that into. Before you know it, you’ll find yourself on a second date involving a bungee jump or open water swimming in a freezing lake. Plus, there is the risk dating will turn into a relationship, and you’ll get found out down the line. Be totally upfront about your likes and dislikes to establish if you are compatible – and remember, there’s nothing wrong with having different interests. It can be just as interesting to find out more about their favourite hobby when you know nothing about it.  

Try an unusual date to show the real you

There can be a lot of pressure on face-to-face conservation, especially if you find it awkward to keep the small talk going with somebody you’ve never met before. Why not try a date that reflects something you’ll really enjoy? An activity-focused date can help show the real you and hopefully help you relax and enjoy the date. Remember, there are no rules when it comes to dating and when you are in your comfort zone, you’ll be happier. A quirky date also takes a lot of the pressure off keeping the conversation going as well, giving you plenty of other ways to suss each other out.

Work with a matchmaker

When you are nervous and unsure about dating, it can be a real asset to have somebody who’s got your back and offering you tons of support. That’s where our expert matchmakers come in. They are extremely experienced in finding hand-selected matches who’ll perfectly suit your personality and relationship goals, using a combination of Myer-Briggs personality profiling, intuition, and our extensive private network to find the perfect person for you. They’ll be on-hand to support you every step of your dating journey, ensuring a stress-free experience and a journey that will leave you feeling confident, energised and safe that leads to the goal of a committed, long-term relationship.

When it comes to first dates, you’re probably not going to learn everything about each other in the space of one evening. However, if you’ve both been authentic and upfront with each other and had a great time, chances are there’s mutual interest there. You’ve then got plenty of opportunity to enjoy learning more about each other on your second date, and beyond!

If you want to find out more about our award-winning matchmaking service, then get in touch with our friendly team today. Your dedicated matchmaker is ready and waiting to expertly help you embark on a successful search for love.

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How your extraversion tendencies can increase your chances of love

Dating was made for those with extraversion traits right? All that socialising, putting yourself out there, meeting new people – it’s bound to come naturally to those of us who thrive on getting their energy from the people and things around them.

While it’s certainly fair to say that those with extraversion traits may have an advantage when it comes to dating, it’s worth understanding in more detail what an extraversion personality is, and more importantly what it can mean when it comes to your dates. Armed with this information, you can ensure you’re approaching your dating journey mindful of any potential pitfalls.

In a nutshell, extraversion means you draw your energy from time spent with other people and active involvement in a lot of different activities. Often described as friendly, outgoing, talkative, enthusiastic, gregarious and a people person, they tend to have a wide circle of friends, a multitude of different interests and enjoy meeting new people. While those with introversion tendencies crave solitude, extraversion personalities can feel uninspired and listless when they are alone for long stretches of time and would much prefer the company of others.

You can see why dating may seem a lot less daunting to those of us with an ‘E’ in our Myers-Briggs Type Indicator test score. There is also research to suggest that those with extraversion personalities outnumber introversions three to one, so you’re bound to encounter plenty of fellow extraversion souls as you embark on your search for the perfect partner. This is certainly good news if you tend to seek out somebody who is like you in both personality and character.

While extraversion certainly lends itself to enjoying dates without the trepidation, there are some tips which are worth bearing in mind if you are looking for love.

Remember, introversion personalities will have a totally different approach to dates

The big thing to remember is that while extraversion personalities may outnumber introversions, you may well find yourself dating somebody with a different personality type to you. As we touched on in last week’s blog, those with introversion personality traits can often find the whole process of socialising draining. It can take time for them to feel relaxed and confident enough to be themselves as you get to know them. If you’re dating someone with introversion tendencies, be mindful of these traits. Organise date venues they’ll appreciate – while you may enjoy a noisy, bustling venue, they won’t appreciate having to shout over loud music. Instead, stick to quieter settings which allow for meaningful conversations and the chance to really get to know each other.

It’s also worth remembering their need for space. While those with extraversion traits may be happy having a jam-packed schedule, an introversion person prefers time to decompress after socialising. Recognise that their reluctance to book in date number two before you’ve even reached the main course might not be a sign they are not into you, they simply may just need time to recharge before embarking on another meeting. Remember that differing personality types can be a great mix in a relationship – offering opportunities for one side to slow down and increase introspection, while on the other hand helping the other meet new people and try new experiences – so embrace it!

Keep an eye on that diary

As someone who enjoys the company of others, you thrive on packing your diary with plenty of social plans to look forward to. Your schedule was probably fairly busy before you even started dating, with plenty of catch-ups with friends, work events and fitness classes on the agenda. However, it can be awfully tempting to get carried away once you start dating, especially if you’ve gone down the route of countless conversations and dates via app-based online dating channels. Remember though, you’re only human and there are only so many hours in a day! Take your time getting to know each new person you meet and you’ll avoid dating burnout. On the flip side, your packed calendar can represent how you are quite at home leading your own life and will set the tone for plenty of independence in a new relationship.

Be prepared to slow things down

If you’re dating a fellow extraversion personality then you can risk a situation where things move too quickly. Your shared love of hitting the town every night, then talking into the early hours, is wonderful but could lead to overload and exhaustion if you’re not careful. It’s great that you’re having a good time but recognise there is no harm in slowing things down sometimes. It’ll just make the reunion even sweeter when it comes!

Remember, you’ve got lots to give

Dating nerves can hit anybody, no matter how sociable or independent they may be. If you are new to dating, or just a little uncertain, remember your extraversion traits stand you in good stead. Generally, those with extraversion personalities are great communicators, good at listening as well as talking, and adept at drawing people into meaningful conversations. Your love of learning about new people makes you fun to chat with, and you’re likely to feel engaged and invigorated by a wide range of different date types.

A matchmaker can help you find the perfect match

No matter how confident you are on your dating journey, you still need to find the right person to achieve the ultimate goal of that long-term, committed relationship. This is where our experienced matchmakers come in. Working hard on your behalf to find the perfect like-minded individual, we use Myers-Briggs personality profiling, intuition, our extensive private network, and plenty of expert experience to hand-select individuals who perfectly complement your personality and lifestyle.

So, while our matchmakers take the hard work out of finding that special person, you can start planning the perfect first date. And just think of the fun you can have once you’ve been introduced to that person you share perfect chemistry with!

If you are looking for that person who really shares your love of living life to the full, then give our team a call today. As an elite matchmaking consultancy, we’ve got the skills and experience to really understand what you are looking for in a partner and we’ll help you every step of the way. 

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How your introversion tendencies can help with your dating game

Putting yourself out there on the dating scene has the potential to test the mettle of even the most confident among us. From approaching somebody you’re interested in, to battling those first pre-date jitters, there can be some serious pushing of your comfort zone when navigating your dating journey.

For those who have introversion traits though, dating poses a particular challenge as it may well represent the very opposite of what you feel comfortable doing. A night at home alone on the sofa in your pyjamas, or spending quality time with your nearest and dearest, may seem far preferable than meeting somebody new for a date.

Put broadly, introversion is a personality trait characterised by focusing more on inner feelings, ideas and images rather than external stimulation of the outer world. It’s hardly an unusual trait – in fact, it is estimated a third of the population have introversion tendencies.

The polar opposite to extraversion, the temperament of somebody with introversion tendencies can mean the whole process of socialising can become particularly draining. People who score an ‘Introversion’ preference on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator may prefer spending time alone or with one or two people they feel comfortable with, rather than in large crowds, and as a result they often need time to recharge after being sociable. While people with extraversion tendencies seek to spend time with other people to recharge their batteries, seen as reflective or reserved, those with introversion traits prefer to avoid environments that are overstimulating. Those among us with introversion tendencies like getting their energy from dealing with the ideas, pictures, memories and reactions inside their own minds and can come across as quiet, as they don’t feel the need to be the centre of attention.

If this sounds like you, you’ll know what we’re talking about when it comes to dating. While having introversion traits doesn’t automatically mean you are shy or reclusive, dating can feel like enough of a performance to risk making you want to freeze up. Don’t despair though – there are a few simple pointers which can help ease you into a date you will actually enjoy, rather than endure.

Remember, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having introversion tendencies

People with introversion tendencies make great listeners, are very observant and can be very easy to talk to. Be reassured you’ve got lots to give, and you’ll make a great conversation partner when you feel relaxed on a date. With this in mind, make sure that first date venue suits you. If a tête-à-tête in a quiet location works for you, then it will help demonstrate to your potential partner your curious and insightful nature.

But if this sounds a bit intimidating, why not try a date based around a shared activity such as a movie or a live performance, to provide you with plenty of conversation starters afterwards? The common interest will allow you to showcase your ability to master the art between starting a conversation and actively listening to their responses, a sought-after trait in partners for most single people.

That said, it’s good to prepare

If the thought of the conversation running dry makes your blood run cold, then it’s well worth having a few topics up your sleeve before you meet. It’s likely you will have been in touch in advance to get an idea of your date’s likes and dislikes, plus you can come armed with some more conversational gold gleaned from their dating profile. Be prepared with interesting questions that’ll lead to engaging discussions that you’ll genuinely enjoy. And don’t forget, open questions can help keep the chat flowing much more than closed questions.

Make sure your outfit does not make you self-conscious

While most of us will often consider buying a new date ensemble once the event is in the diary, now is not the time for selecting an outfit just because you think the other person would like it or dressing up to the nines if your signature style is more jeans and a comfy jumper. Pick something which you feel comfortable and relaxed in and you’ll feel a lot more confident and spend less time doubting your choice and instead focus more on the conversation and situation at hand.

And remember, don’t pretend to be something you’re not

Avoid falling into the trap of doing what you think you should be doing on a date. If you try and pretend you’re something you’re not, or agree to a date which really isn’t your cup of tea, you’ll could end up having a rubbish time and more than likely your body language is likely to give it away to your date. Be honest about what you like doing and if you’ve both agreed to meet after reading each other’s profiles, it is likely that somewhere in there is some common ground that you can work with.

Work with a matchmaker

Sometimes it helps to have someone to help guide and support you through your dating journey, particularly if it’s outside of your comfort zone. Here at Ignite Dating, we specialise in hand-selected introductions, using our vast experience, extensive network and intuitive personality profiling to find you the perfect match. We’re here to help improve your confidence and take all the hard work out of dating, so you can just sit back, relax and enjoy the journey.

There’s no need to stress about the search for a potential partner, as we’ll help you find the right person by bringing hand-selected potential matches to you. We’ll work closely with you to decide what is important to you and the type of person you’d like to meet and when you feel ready to meet somebody new, we’ll be there every step of the way. We can assist with all those crucial first-date preparations and suggest tactics and strategies for embarking on a first meeting you’ll truly enjoy. With a matchmaker in your corner, you can sit back, relax and know that an expert is working hard on your behalf to find you true love.

We’re here to find you the perfect partner who truly understands you and shares your values, aspirations and lifestyle. Get in touch today and our team of friendly matchmakers will confidently guide you through every step of your dating journey.

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How a matchmaker can improve your chances of finding love

You may remember that infamous scene in the movie Bridget Jones’s Diary when the lead character is grilled on single life at a dinner party.

Surrounded by a table of “smug married couples”, Bridget is asked why there are just so many unmarried women in their thirties. As the room falls silent, she bats away the remark with a witty retort, joking: “I suppose it doesn’t help that underneath our clothes our entire bodies are covered in scales.”

It’s a depressingly familiar situation you may well recognise if you are indeed a single person over the age of 30. From friends and relatives asking supposedly innocuous questions about when you’re going to settle down, to complete strangers making small talk about your relationship status, there can sometimes feel like there is a certain amount of judgement about being unattached in your thirties and beyond.

Which, when you think about it, is decidedly unfair seeing as an increasing number of single women have decided there is so much more to life than rushing to secure their very own Mark Darcy.

Recent figures from the Office for National Statistics actually show that the number of people who are single and have never married is steadily increasing. This, coupled with the fact that the proportion of people getting married has actually fallen in all age groups under 70, and it seems conscious unattachment is well and truly on the rise. In fact, a recent study found the happiest subgroup of the population was women who never married or had children, who lead longer, healthier lives, but that isn’t a sign that you should hang up your dating shoes and give up on love.  

There are numerous reasons singledom is being celebrated and embraced by those over the age of 29. For one, society has evolved, and many women are opting to focus more on career development, with a lot of satisfaction to be found in being self-sufficient and on top of your game at work.

There’s also the ability to make big life choices without having to take anybody else’s wishes into consideration. Perhaps you fancy moving abroad or taking a career break to travel the world. It’s totally up to you to focus on the things you’d love to achieve.

Being single can also lead to stronger friendships and more time to focus on building  a supportive network of people around you, perhaps with those who are also living a happy single life on their own.  

Not only that, but science has come a long way too. Fertility preservation is now an option, helping many slow down their search for love without the pressure to hurry to meet somebody – and ultimately settling for anything less than they deserve just because they feel rushed into starting a family.

While these are all valid reasons to live your thirties happily unattached, waiting for the right person to come along but enjoying life in the meantime, it is important to not fall into the trap of being so independent that you avoid relationships full stop.

Having dated extensively in their twenties, by the time women reach their thirties and beyond, they tend to have a much better understanding of what they are looking for and, with this, comes a desire to avoid mediocre relationships with a man who doesn’t check all the boxes.

However, for many, if somebody comes along that they have an authentic connection with that ultimately doesn’t check all the boxes, then they would be happy to settle down. It’s all about the quality of the match – and making sure that the important aspects such as values, aspirations and lifestyle are in sync and the best way to find that is to be open to the possibilities and to date with purpose.

Here at Ignite Dating we understand that being happily single does not mean giving up on the search for love. That’s why we offer a personalised matchmaking service designed to effortlessly assist you in your search for somebody who is perfect for you. While looks and attraction can be important, lifestyle, values and aspirations are just as much so.

We work with you to really understand the traits and qualities that are most important to you and what you are looking for. We then search our exclusive private network to hand-select introductions to incredible people that have the potential to lead to the ultimate goal of a long-term, committed relationship. And when you’re ready to start your dating journey, we’ll be there every step of the way to offer advice and guidance to ensure that your dating journey leaves you feeling confident, energised and safe!

If you have decided now is the right time to find somebody new, or you’re looking for a helping hand finding that person who you will really share a spark with, give our team of expert matchmakers a call today. They are here to offer you support every step of the way, with plenty of expert insight and guidance to help you find the perfect match.

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Nailing the first impression

Now the days are getting longer, and the weather is heating up, it’s time to refresh your wardrobe and dating journey to ensure you’re ready for the multitude of dates heading your way this Spring. This Spring season is all about shedding the winter blues and stepping into a season full of bold colours, feminine silhouettes, clean lines, and exquisite tailoring.

Putting your best foot forward and nailing the first impression on the date is key to building your confidence, showing up as your best self and also landing a second date! But when it comes to what to wear on the first date, there are so many options out there that it can be overwhelming! Here’s a few tips to get you started.

For her

Ladies less is more. Always start by highlighting your best features. A woman’s decolletage is such a feminine feature and the best way to highlight that is by wearing an off-the-shoulder silk blouse. Think Adele Bardot neckline – sexy, bold but also sultry. Another component in achieving that put together look that is sure to grab attention for all the right reasons is finding the right colours for your skin tone. If you have a deeper olive tone to your skin focusing on pieces that are made up of jewel tones are key. Whereas for those with a lighter skin tone and lighter tones to the hair you want to opt for pastels! Wearing the right ensemble for the date in question can completely change the dynamic of the first initial meeting and a small compliment can turn into an ice breaker and set the tone of the evening ahead. 

It’s also important to remember that balance is key when picking out the perfect outfit. If you decide to go with trousers, make sure the fit is perfect and team it with something a little sexier on top, after all men are visual creatures and you want to add a touch of femininity to your look. For dress silhouettes, opt for a midi slip dress, paired with a very structured blazer or moto jacket, depending on the location of the date.

Don’t forget the small details too. For accessories, tie in a bold statement piece and keep everything else minimal. If you choose to wear fine jewellery, layer those dainty necklaces which adds more depth to your outfit. When it comes to footwear, wear a shoe that’s comfortable and in line with what you are doing on your date. For a traditional dinner and drinks date, opt for a strappy heel or pump which is still sexy but also sophisticated. 

For Him

Tailoring is key when it comes to a man’s ensemble. For the first date the idea is to look polished, which starts with making sure everything fits. Whether you are opting for a romantic dinner or casual drinks at a nice bar, wearing a sport coat with dark denim jeans which can be worn with a classic fitted white button up shirt, is always a classy and easy look to achieve. When it comes to denim jeans, always choose a dark, slim, straight cut as it’s the most flattering style for men, regardless of your size and body shape.

Depending on the occasion, you want to pair this look with a suede brown loafer or any neutral colour oxford shoe. To simplify the look for a more casual date, like a trip to the movies, opt for a fitted white tee instead of a white button up shirt. Always remember to choose an outfit based on the date in mind.

Don’t forget the rest of you! While you may have the outfit sorted, remember that women see everything so attention to detail and grooming is key to securing that second date!

If you’re single and looking to Spring clean your dating journey and try something new, then get in touch with our friendly team of experts today. Our matchmakers and dating experts are on hand to ensure that you are ready to start your dating journey on the right track.

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Why a pre-work date should be next in your diary

Are you a night owl – the type of person who feels much more focused and energetic in the evening? Or would you say you’re more of a lark – a morning person who prefers to be up at the crack of dawn? If it’s the latter, the latest dating trend might be just up your street. 

Dawn dating describes meeting with a prospective romantic partner when the day is young, and it’s fast becoming as popular as the more traditional evening dinner and drinks.

With around 51% of single people admitting they have been on a morning date recently and nearly three-quarters saying they’d be impressed to be invited to an early morning rendezvous, it seems people are quite literally seizing the day and meeting up, fresh-faced, for a date in the morning before the normal routine of the day starts. The benefits? Think less Chardonnay, more extra-shot lattes, and getting to know you strolls rather than making awkward small talk across the dining table.

Perhaps dawn dating is a trend you’ve already got plenty of experience with. After all, for a while the pandemic saw meeting up with a potential love interest being legally relegated to the outdoors. An informal stroll with a coffee in hand may have become a firm favourite as you eschew more pricey nights out. 

Even if early mornings aren’t usually your bag, there are plenty of benefits to setting your alarm an hour or two earlier for a date with a difference. 

Those aforementioned early risers might find their date is likeminded in their approach for seizing the day and getting things done before lunch. Quite often they will use the mornings to participate in hobbies and leisure activities and you may even find that you share a passion for early morning activities, whether it’s a run in the park, a fitness class or maybe even a spot of people watching over a coffee.

But even if that isn’t the case, there are many benefits to opting for a morning rather than evening for your next date. For starters, how often do you find that you go for a romantic meal somewhere and before you know it one glass of wine turns into sharing a bottle? Not adding alcohol to the mix allows for a clearer head and less worries about overdoing it – unless a bottomless brunch is on your agenda. You’ll be sure to remember a lot more of what you chatted about for future dates as well.

There’s also the added bonus of easing the endless diary juggling which goes hand-in-hand with a busy working life and competing demands for your evening time. Between work, family commitments and friends, it can often feel impossible to fit dating into your already hectic schedule. While it may seem nerve-wracking to meet in the morning, it can ease the pressure of committing to a longer date in the evening with somebody you’ve never met before. Clock-watching may not seem romantic, but it can help focus the date and add a natural endpoint when you both need to head off to other commitments.

Like everything, dawn dating, of course, might not be for everybody. Your morning routine may just be too hectic to fit in another activity. The worry of making it to work in time may be too much of a distraction to make the idea enjoyable. Or quite simply, you may miss the routine of taking your time getting ready for an evening out with a glass of wine to settle those pre-date jitters.

If you’re looking to mix it up a bit, or you want to break the cycle of rushing to a date in a post-work flurry, then maybe it’s worth giving an early morning meet-up a go. We predict as the weather warms up and the sunrise gets earlier, this trend will continue to grow, and those diaries will be just as full at the start of the day as they are in the evenings!

If you are single and looking for that special person that you just cannot wait to see, whatever time of day it is, then get in touch with our friendly team today. Our expert matchmakers are on-hand to offer help and guidance throughout your dating journey to help you find the perfect partner. 

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5 expectations that can hold you back when dating

When looking for love, it’s normal to have an idea of how you envision your partner and future relationship to be. But, at what point does the checklist become detrimental to your quest for love?

Unrealistic expectations are a common barrier that stop people from achieving dating success and most of the time people aren’t aware that they are doing it – until it’s pointed out to them. Here we explore some of the main reasons that stop relationships from developing into a successful long-term connection, and why it’s important to take a more laid-back approach in your dating journey.

Comparing your date to previous dates or relationships

You may have heard the saying ‘comparison is the thief of joy.’ Well, comparing your date with someone you’ve dated or had a relationship with in the past will set both of you up to fail and will ensure you find reasons not to go out on a date with them again. It’s not uncommon to look for certain physical and personality traits that you find attractive when you’re dating, and although it would be amazing if we could take the best parts from every date we’ve ever had and mould them into the perfect partner, it’s just not realistic. Try to remember that everyone is unique, with their own set of experiences and beliefs. Instead of comparing and focusing on the parts that don’t match up to your past partners, it’s important to try to pay attention to the person’s positive qualities. After all, an ex is an ex for a reason and who knows those differences could be the qualities that you’ve been missing and the answer in your search for that perfect partner for you.

Only dating your usual ‘type’

With the huge array of dating apps and websites at your disposal that allow filtering by personal and physical traits, being selective has never been easier. However, restricting your preferences could stop you meeting that perfect partner – you simply don’t know who you are going to connect with. Dating a certain ‘type’ can be very limiting and realistically if it hasn’t worked before what makes you think it will work now? Try to stay open-minded and give people a chance. They may not tick all of your usual boxes, but don’t automatically write them off as someone you won’t be interested in. What have you got to lose? You may just find the love of your life in that person you initially discounted.

Expecting your date to make the arrangements and pay for everything

Traditionally, the man would ask a girl out, plan their first date and pick up the tab. However, when it comes to modern dating there are no set rules and it is totally dependent upon each couple. Deciding together on where to go on your date can be fun and sets the tone for a more equal relationship moving forward. Dating is about getting to know someone and learning to make decisions together, so discussing ideas and learning about each others’ preferences ensures you both enjoy yourself on the date. However, when it comes to who should pay, it can be an awkward moment – especially if you’ve not discussed it beforehand. Usually, whoever invited the other person out and chose the venue should pay for the date. However, if the date and location was a mutual decision, it’s always good to split the bill. We’re not in the dark ages anymore, so as a rule of thumb always offer to pay half and be genuine about your offer.

Expecting too much from the relationship
Having expectations about how your relationship should develop or how your partner should treat you is a good thing. However, expecting much more than the other person is ready or prepared to give can lead to you feeling needy, disappointed and alone. For instance, you may want to spend every spare moment with your significant other or you may always expect them to plan your next date night. Whatever your expectations, if you’re finding yourself feeling let down and unfulfilled, try to have a conversation about how you both feel and remember that everyone’s needs and expectations in a relationship are different. When you are able to discuss this openly and honestly you will begin to understand your differences and in turn, you are then able to make compromises and come together with similar expectations ensuring that both of your needs are met.

Expecting things to move faster or slower in a new relationship

Many people struggle to find the right speed in a relationship and question if they’re moving too fast or too slow. There’s no perfect speed with which to move forward in a relationship but if you’ve already created your wedding pinterest board after date two, you may want to slow down a bit. Again, communication is key here. You may find that you have different expectations on how quickly your relationship should develop but that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re not a good match. Ensure that you and your date are on the same page and take the time to discuss expectations. If you are in two different life phases and anticipating different levels of commitment, it’s better to know from the beginning before growing close to one another. Rather than having a set timeline in mind for your relationship, focus on having a good time and enjoying the other person’s company and see where things go naturally.

If you’re single and looking for a new way to date that manages your expectations so you can find that successful, long-term relationship that you’re searching for, then get in touch with our friendly team of expert matchmakers today to find out more about how they can support you on your dating journey and set you up for success.

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The value of trust: why choosing the right agency is crucial to your journey

Navigating the dating landscape can be tricky, especially without the specialist knowledge and insight from industry professionals. But thankfully, there are plenty of experts and agencies out there just waiting to help and guide you in the right direction.

But often that can be another challenge in itself. So how do you figure out who or where is the best fit for your journey?

Here are some considerations when choosing the right experts to help you in your search for love.

Credibility

It’s really important that anyone who is guiding you on this often-vulnerable journey is reputable and has the correct experience. Be sure to conduct your own due diligence and research on a company or an individual before putting your trust in them. If they are reputable and experienced there should be plenty of reviews, ratings, and references available to you which will indicate the level and quality of their work. Awards and accreditations are also a sign of a high-standard, legitimate, and quality agency or individual.

At Ignite Dating we pride ourselves on the quality of our services and going above and beyond the industry-standard to provide a dating journey that leaves clients feeling confident, energised and importantly, safe. It is no surprise then, that as a company we invest in the best available training for our matchmakers and why we are the only matchmaking agency in the UK that’s full team of matchmakers has undergone training and received accreditation from the Matchmaking Institute – the world’s only organisation authorised to issue certification in the field of matchmaking.

Not only that, but we also have several award recognitions under its built including the recently announced Dating Agency of the Year – South West award at the Prestige Awards. These achievements are not only great for us to achieve, but recognition like this can give you a much-deeper insight into the way that the agency works and help you determine whether they really have your best interests at heart.

Compatibility

Your relationship with your matchmaker is equally as important as the romantic relationship that you’re seeking out; if you’re not comfortable being open and honest with them, then they’re probably not the right matchmaker for you.

To get the most out of the service it’s important to work with someone who you can really resonate with, and you feel understands your needs. You will be working very closely with this individual, so you need to be confident that they understand criteria that are most important to you and have the passion to help and support you on your journey.

Be sure to interview your matchmaker as much as they interview you; what can they offer you? Are they listening to you? Do they have the necessary experience, skills, accreditation, and network to help you? 

At Ignite Dating, each client is assigned their own dedicated matchmaker who will introduce them to hand-selected introductions that have values, aspirations and a lifestyle that align with their own. We invest time working with clients to get them to the right place, so they have the confidence to start dating and can recognise when the right person is in front of them.

Your matchmaker is on hand to offer support and guidance throughout your entire dating adventure, so it’s imperative that you have the right relationship with your matchmaker and that they resonate with your own personal beliefs and values before you start on that quest for love.

With hundreds of hours and thousands of pounds invested by single people looking for their ideal partner online, not to mention the resilience that you need, going it alone can actually be much harder, and more expensive than you think. But it isn’t your only option.

If you’ve found an agency that you can be open and honest with, who understands who you are and what you are looking for and comes with an array of experience, testimonials, and accolades that back up their claims, then it sounds like they could be the right agency for you.

Finding the right matchmaker or dating coach can be half the battle.

So instead of spending yet more money, time and attention aimlessly searching for that special person, why not let the experts’ put things into focus and help you find that perfect partner you’ve been searching for. You may be surprised by how much quicker your journey can be once you’ve put your faith and trust in the professionals.

If you want to find out more about Ignite Dating and its award-winning service, then get in touch with our friendly team today and let our expert matchmakers put you on the right track to success.

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Avoiding The Tinder Swindlers

Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last few weeks, you have probably already heard about Tinder Swindler, the trending Netflix true crime documentary. If you haven’t watched it yet, it’s a must see, especially if you are a single lady looking for love online.

This gripping documentary tells the story of how 31-year-old Simon Leviev conned woman around the globe out of thousands of pounds, via credit cards and loans, leaving them with crippling amounts of debt. Despite the luxurious lifestyle and endless possibilities portrayed, it highlights how online dating can go wrong, very quickly.

Fast cars, luxury brands, enviable locations, and private jets – Simon Leviev’s life appeared to be one of a hugely successful businessman. Falsely claiming to be the ‘Prince of Diamonds’, the son of a Russian-Israeli billionaire and diamond mogul, Simon seduced his victims with his extravagant, lavish lifestyle, gaining their trust and love, before deceiving them out of their money. Contrary to the persona portrayed, in reality, Simon’s real name is Shimon Yehuda Hayut, an Israeli conman convicted of theft, forgery and fraud going back several years.

After Simon’s victims made the regrettable decision to swipe right, they were duped into falling for him through his use of clever stories, convincing videos, and continuous lies to manipulate, persuade and exploit them. He would shower the women with lavish trips and gifts, which were all paid for by his other unsuspecting victims. He’d then ask for more and more money under the guise of needing to protect his identity due to security concerns and stating that enemies were ‘out to get him’.

Romance fraudsters are usually patient and often groom victims for many months, building a relationship and establishing trust, before attempting to steal their money. Conveying themselves as vulnerable and in need of help, these callous individuals often claim to have a job that requires long periods of travel to explain the long time lapses between contact – they may pretend that they are in the armed forces or are an offshore oil-rig worker for instance. After months of grooming, they will then ask for help financially, whether it’s an issue with a visa, health problems or simply getting a flight home to them.

Unfortunately, these stories are no longer few and far between.

In the first half of 2021 alone, over £15 million was lost to romance scams. Two in five people who dated someone they met online in the last year said they were asked to give or lend money, despite having never met in-person. Of those that were asked to give or lend money by someone they met online, over half did so – putting them at risk of being a victim of a romance scam.

However, the good news is that there is a better and safer way to meet that special person, without the need for an online presence. Matchmakers and introduction agencies are fast becoming the option of choice for successful professionals across the UK and it’s easy to see why. There is no need to have an online presence or spend time writing a profile or uploading photos to a website. Instead, an experienced and professional matchmaker will do all the hard work for you to get you dating ready.

Providing a safer experience with ID-checked introductions, most matchmaking agencies will also carry out other checks on clients including looking into their digital footprint to ensure that any individuals are legitimate and who they say they are, to offer a safer and more secure dating journey for their clients.

Taking the guesswork out of hours of scrolling through profiles online and making polite conversation with potential dates, your matchmaker will get to work sourcing and selecting the right introductions for you – so you can sit back, relax, and wait for genuine introductions to be brought to you knowing that each and every one has the potential to be that perfect partner you’ve been searching for.

If you are single and looking for a safer way to date, then get in touch with our friendly team today and find out how we can help you find genuine and honest connections with single people who share the same aspirations, values and lifestyle as you.

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Seven deadly sins of dating: how important is intelligence really?

Maybe it’s the boom of online dating and the necessity to have a checklist or the fact that more and more of us are heading to university each year, but the education level of a partner seems to be playing a dominant role in the criteria of successful, single professionals in recent years.

More recently, nearly 70% of people admit that it’s important or very important to be intellectually challenged by a romantic partner. A trend that seems to be more highly valued amongst millennials than any other generation. But why have we become so focused on education?

While men aren’t so focused on education levels, for many women who are educated to degree level and beyond, finding a partner that has similar credentials when it comes to education status is significant. For the most part, women find it easier to connect with a partner who has a similar knowledge base and has shared comparable experiences. While that may make sense for the most part, particularly if intelligent and stimulating conversation is an attribute that you admire most in a person, there is one major flaw that is being overlooked.

The problem. The ratio of degree educated men to women in life – not just on dating sites or through agencies – just doesn’t add up. In the UK alone, nearly 67,000 more women enrol in further education than men. Put simply, there aren’t enough degree educated men to go around!

Women are more highly educated than ever before and the reason that many women can’t find a partner with similar qualifications is because they simply don’t exist. But life experiences and success go far beyond sitting in a university lecture hall. And people like Bill Gates, Richard Branson, Steve Jobs, Walt Disney and many more are testament to that.

When we meet people organically, where someone went to school or the qualification they have, are often irrelevant and questions saved for job interviews, not dates. The reason being is that fundamentally, we don’t really care. In fact, it’s usually something that comes up after a connection has been formed with that person and at that stage bears very little impact on the way you see them or feel about them. Realistically, are you going to end a great relationship over the fact that six months in you find out that they failed university or dropped out of school – honestly the answer is no. We have also discovered that men who fall into the ultra-high net worth category are usually business savvy, rather than academic, with many of them leaving school with no formal qualifications at all. Would the missing piece of paper with a set of numbers on really be a hurdle to meeting a successful man who could be your perfect match?

While the checklist culture of online dating has led us to believe that education is an important attribute to measure whether you move forward with a proposed match, it’s crucial to recognise that it may just be a barrier you’re putting in place – and one that statistically speaking is unlikely to come to fruition for many people.

Next time you’re looking over a profile and everything else lines up but the education level, stop and remember the household names that we mentioned above. Success comes in all different forms, and you may even find that whether they attended university or not, the life experiences that they have and the intellect that they channel, might be more aligned than you ever could have imagined.

So, let’s leave the education questions to the interview boardroom where they belong!

If you’re single and looking for a new way to date that focuses on the things that really matter, then get in touch with our expert team of matchmakers today. With their expert knowledge and extensive experience, they can guide you away from the barriers you’ve been relying on and open your journey to the relationship that you truly deserve.