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Modern dating isn’t all about candlelit dinners and finding someone who laughs at your jokes, it’s a psychological, biological and even technological experience.

Whether you always swipe right, ghost partners when it gets too real, double-text or open up on the second date, your dating habits are a reflection of your personality, emotional history and attachment style.

Understanding these habits isn’t just about improving your love life, it’s about getting to know yourself better and increasing your chances of finding the right partner.

1. Serial swiping

If you have used, or still use, dating apps, you’ll know these platforms have made screening potential partners fast and convenient, allowing you to simply swipe your way through thousands of possible candidates.

The trouble is that these apps also reflect how quickly we form judgments and how shallow they can be. Studies show that many app users will make decisions about potential matches in less than one second! And there’s no denying this is usually based on their physical appearance (and perhaps the occasional unforgivably cringe bio).

Another issue is that this rapid judgment activates the brain’s reward system, similar to the dopamine hit you get from gambling or eating chocolate.

But serial swiping often suggests something deeper about your personality.

According to psychologists, a fast swiper is usually impulsive and seeks novelty traits and behaviours, like grand romantic gestures rather than everyday interactions. They want instant gratification and fear commitment, typically with a preference for superficial connections rather than real, deeper ones.

2. Ghosting

Have you ever been talking to someone and then just disappeared from the conversation or relationship without explanation?

Ghosting has become a common (and painful) part of dating culture and psychologists link this behaviour to avoidant attachment styles, where individuals struggle with emotional closeness and prefer to distance themselves when things get too real.

How you respond to being ghosted can also reveal something about your dating style and emotional resilience. People with secure attachment styles may process this rejection quickly and move on.

Interestingly, research also shows that people who ghost tend to underestimate the emotional harm it causes to others. They often justify it as a way to avoid conflict, suggesting discomfort with confrontation if they have to end a relationship with someone.

Unfortunately, those with anxious attachment styles may ruminate and overanalyse the situation if ghosted, and this can cause them to spiral into self-doubt.

3. Dating déjà vu

We recently mentioned this in another blog post, but if you find yourself drawn to similar types of people, perhaps emotionally unavailable partners, fixer-uppers or intense short-term flames, it might be worth asking yourself why.

These patterns can reflect unresolved issues from your past or unconscious desires. For instance, consistently chasing unavailable people might point to an anxious attachment style and someone who seeks validation through winning over a difficult partner.

Alternatively, if you gravitate toward emotionally safe but often mundane partners, you might be prioritising security over your happiness and passions.

4. Complete clarity

Do you enter the dating world clear about your intentions and what you want from a relationship?

There’s nothing wrong with that, provided you don’t push people away too quickly. In fact, people who value directness and clarity often feel more confident in their emotional needs and are less afraid of rejection.

On the other hand, those who send mixed signals or keep their date guessing may be struggling with uncertainty about what they want themselves. They could also be using ambiguity as a defence mechanism to avoid getting hurt.

5. Floodlighting

Do you have a tendency to give away a lot of details about yourself on a first date?

This is referred to as floodlighting and is when someone shares a lot of personal information about previous relationships, issues or childhood trauma with someone they’ve just met.

This can present as being open and vulnerable and could be done deliberately or subconsciously. Either way, those who floodlight tend to do so to test the waters and speed up intimacy, possibly to see if the other person can ‘handle’ them.

While some might see this as a good thing, psychologically, it can also be emotionally manipulative and actually suggests you’re putting on a bit of a front to make people think you’re open and communicative when really, you’re testing them.

6. Guarding

Some people walk into a first date ready to share stories, ask deep questions and be emotionally present. Others are more reserved, keeping the conversation light and avoiding anything too personal.

If you tend to keep your guard up during the dating phase, you might be more cautious due to past experiences. You could also show an avoidant attachment style, where closeness can feel overwhelming.

7. Double-texting

Your texting habits can reveal a lot about your dating style, too. If you’re someone who texts often and expects quick replies, you might be more expressive and value emotional availability.

Consider if you would ever text them twice in a row if they don’t reply. Some may see this as desperation, while others just enthusiasm. Of course, the truth lies in context, but frequent double-texting can suggest a strong desire for connection and responsiveness.

While some interpret it as neediness, others see it as confidence, especially when the messages are thoughtful rather than demanding.

Psychologically, people who double-text may actually be more successful when dating, showing that they’re not afraid to put themselves out there. In contrast, those who play it cool and hold back communication might do so because they value autonomy or fear vulnerability.

Not only that, but if you prefer space and slow communication, you could be more independent or protective of your personal time.

8. Hiding hints in your dating profile

Lastly, most people on the market have or will create a dating profile at some point, whether that’s on a dating app or through a matchmaking service.

Creating this profile is an exercise in self-branding, and the choices you make reflect how you want to be seen and what you value the most. For example, what photos you use, whether you are witty or sincere and how much personal information you choose to include.

We often project an idealised version of ourselves into these profiles, and psychologists say there could be a lot to read between those lines.

Let’s say your profile states, “sarcasm is my love language,” while this might come across as playful, it could actually be your subtle way of warning potential partners you are emotionally unavailable.

Similarly, if your profile emphasises travel and adventure, it might signal openness to experience, whereas a focus on career or goals may highlight ambition and conscientiousness.

Even the kind of pictures you choose can indicate your levels of self-esteem and social orientation, so think carefully about what your profile says about you both outwardly and under all those layers.

Do you recognise any of these habits?

Your dating habits are like breadcrumbs, pointing to deeper truths about how you relate to others and to yourself.

While there’s no one-size-fits-all formula for relationships, paying attention to your own behaviours when dating can help you break old patterns, communicate better and connect more authentically.

So next time you find yourself repeating unhelpful dating habits, pause and ask: what does this really say about me? And if you need more support in breaking these habits and finding the right potential partners, you’re in the right place.

Get in touch with our talented team of matchmakers for more dating tips and advice and help finding the perfect partner for you.

Dating in 2025 can feel like a pendulum swinging from one extreme to the other, from intense love bombing one day to ghosting the next.

We’ve seen it all: swamping, future-faking, throning and freak matching. But 2025 is bringing in a refreshingly different approach to romance called micro-mancing.

What is micro-mancing?

If you’ve not heard the term micro-mancing before, this dating trend is about embracing the small, intentional acts of affection. It’s essentially the romantic equivalent of microdosing happiness.

Instead of grand gestures or intense, fast-burning relationships, micro-mancing thrives on the little things, such as remembering their go-to coffee order, sending them a funny meme that reminded you of them or checking in after their big team meeting.

It’s love in soft focus, not fireworks. And while we might all grow up dreaming of those big romantic gestures, those are usually not enough to sustain a genuine, long-lasting relationship.

So, here’s why micro-mancing is the dating energy we should all be channeling in 2025.

It’s the antidote to dating burnout

With endless messaging, algorithmic-based swiping and performative first dates, modern dating can feel like a full-time job.

And let’s face it, most of us are exhausted. Not from love itself but from the constant pressure to perform, impress, and “win” someone’s affection — all with the possibility that they’ll simply disappear and stop replying to your messages anyway.

But micro-mancing slows things down. It’s not about rushing to exclusivity or mapping out your future on date three.

It’s about creating connection through the small, consistent moments that build intimacy over time. We think you’ll agree a regular “thinking of you” text can go a lot further than the odd grand romantic gesture when it comes to emotional presence.

It puts focus on intentionality, not intensity

Let’s be real for a minute, some people chase intensity because it mimics passion. But in most cases, intensity without substance fades fast. Micro-mancing shifts the focus to intentionality. It’s about showing someone you’re thinking of them in thoughtful, low-pressure ways.

For example, maybe you pick up their favourite snack on your way over to their house, or you remember that they absolutely hate taking the bins out, so you offer to do this for them after dinner.

These gestures are small, but they say, I see you, you matter to me and I want to make you happy.

It works physically and digitally

Micro-mancing isn’t limited by your physical proximity to your partner. Whether you’re doing long-distance dating, away travelling, or just getting to know someone through texts, these micro-acts work across the board.

A good morning message, a playlist curated for their weekend, or even sending a voice note when you’re out for a walk—it’s all part of building that slow but genuine connection.

And the best part? These small gestures create a sense of emotional presence without feeling overwhelming or clingy, they are inexpensive and show you truly care.

It creates space for organic connection

One of the biggest complaints in modern dating is how transactional it can feel. Asking the same questions over and over again — date after date. It can make dating feel like a job interview.

However, micro-mancing brings back that slow, sweet burn. You get to know someone bit by bit, allowing the relationship to unfold more naturally instead of trying to define it or putting a label on it immediately.

It’s far more sustainable

Last but not least, grand gestures and big declarations of love can be great, but they’re hard to keep up. Micro-mancing, on the other hand, is sustainable. It’s not about spending loads of money or constantly being switched on. It’s about showing up, consistently and authentically.

This kind of love builds trust because it shows you care not just when it’s convenient but in the quiet, ordinary moments too.

So, this year, forget the performative stuff. Skip the pressure and just be real. Try micro-mancing, because love doesn’t have to be loud to be meaningful—it just has to be real.

But if you are still looking for the perfect partner, someone you can get to know slowly but genuinely, someone to micro-mance, we can help. Get in touch with our team of expert matchmakers today and make 2025 the year you find true love.

In today’s fast-paced, digitally-driven world, finding a meaningful connection can feel more challenging than ever. With dating apps dominating the social landscape and work schedules often leaving less time for traditional courtship, many singles are turning to innovative ways to meet potential partners. One such trend that has been quietly gaining momentum is parent-funded dating services. These services, supported financially by parents who are eager to see their adult children find love, offer a refreshing and thoughtful approach to modern matchmaking.

Bridging generations with love

Parent-funded dating services bring an intergenerational twist to the quest for romance. They allow parents, who have a vested interest in their children’s happiness and long-term stability, to play an active and supportive role in the process. While this might sound unconventional, it’s not entirely new. Historically, families have always been involved in matchmaking – this modern adaptation simply uses professional services and technology to create a more personalised experience.

One of the most appealing aspects of parent-funded dating services is the balance they strike between traditional values and contemporary needs. Parents – typically with more life experience and a deeper understanding of lasting relationships – can contribute insights that their children may overlook. By working with skilled matchmakers or curated platforms, they help identify potential partners who align with their adult children’s values, goals, and lifestyles.

Tailored services for busy lives

Unlike generic dating apps that rely heavily on algorithms, these services offer a bespoke experience. Professional matchmakers take the time to understand the unique preferences, personality traits, and aspirations of their clients. If desired, they can also incorporate parental input, ensuring a holistic understanding of what might constitute a perfect match.

This approach is particularly beneficial for individuals with demanding careers who may lack the time or energy to navigate the dating scene. Parents – who often have more time and resources at their disposal – can ease the burden by handling the initial stages of matchmaking, from researching reputable services to financing the process.

Reducing the pressure

For many singles, modern dating can feel overwhelming, with swiping and superficial interactions often leading to burnout. Parent-funded dating services take a lot of the stress out of the equation. By delegating some of the responsibility to trusted professionals (and supportive parents), individuals can focus on building authentic connections without the distractions of endless scrolling or awkward first encounters.

This method can also mitigate some of the social anxieties tied to dating. Parents who fund these services often bring a sense of encouragement and support to the process, aided by professional matchmakers, helping their adult children approach relationships with a more open mind and less pressure.

Strengthening family bonds

Interestingly, these services can also strengthen the bond between parents and their adult children. When families work together toward a shared goal – in this case, helping a son or daughter find a life partner – it fosters deeper communication and understanding. Parents gain a clearer perspective on their child’s values and preferences, while children can appreciate their parents’ wisdom and commitment to their happiness.

Of course, boundaries are crucial to making this dynamic work. At Ignite Dating, we emphasise collaboration rather than control, ensuring that the client remains at the centre of the decision-making process. Professional matchmakers often mediate these discussions, ensuring that everyone’s voices are heard and respected, but ultimately, it is the single person that garners control of the process.

Success stories speak volumes

The rising popularity of parent-funded dating services is reflected by the many success stories shared by families who have embraced this approach. Testimonials often highlight how these services have led to meaningful, long-term relationships – and sometimes even marriages. What’s particularly heartwarming is that these stories often involve not just the couple, but their families as well, celebrating the union as a collective triumph.

One mother, who funded our Ignite Dating services for her daughter, described it as “the best investment I’ve ever made,” noting that the process brought them closer and ultimately introduced her daughter to someone she may not have met otherwise. Stories like these underscore the power of blending traditional family values with modern matchmaking services to achieve lasting happiness.

A win-win approach

Critics might argue that parent-funded dating services risk being overly involved or intrusive, but the reality is that when done thoughtfully, they can be empowering. Far from dictating their children’s romantic lives, parents who fund these services are expressing their care and commitment in a constructive way. By supporting their children emotionally and financially, they’re helping them find the kind of love that forms the foundation of a fulfilling life.

In a world where online dating has become increasingly transactional and isolating, parent-funded dating services offer a breath of fresh air. They remind us of the value of family and intentionality in the search for meaningful connections. And for many singles, knowing that their parents are cheering them on – not just in spirit, but in action – can make all the difference.

If you’re a parent considering funding matchmaking services for your son or daughter, get in touch with our team of expert matchmakers to find out how we can provide support in finding your child a fulfilling and successful relationship.

Are you dating someone who’s always travelling?

It doesn’t matter whether it’s for work or pleasure, nationally or internationally; when you’re in a relationship with someone who is away a lot, it can be challenging.

You miss them when they’re away, of course, and it can be much harder to squeeze in quality time together between trips.

But the good news is, with a little extra effort and creativity, you can maintain a strong and connected relationship with your partner, no matter how often they travel. Here’s how.

Communicate regularly

It might seem obvious, but it’s so important that you stay in touch and communicate regularly. This might seem easy in the world of WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger and other instant messaging platforms, but it’s not just about the occasional check-in.

It’s a good idea to schedule calls or video chats to stay in sync and use texts, voice notes and even emails, if that suits you, to share your daily thoughts, feelings and updates.
This might require a bit of flexibility with time zones and work schedules, but make sure you don’t let this habit slip.

You could even try fun, shared digital experiences, like watching movies together or playing online games. Remember all those fun ways we discovered to stay connected during the Lockdown? It might be time to dust them off.

Send thoughtful little surprises

There are lots of sweet (and inexpensive) ways you can send thoughtful gifts and surprises to your partner while they’re away. You could mail them handwritten letters, postcards or small gifts that let them know you’re thinking about them.

Alternatively, you could do something different, like ordering their favourite meal to be delivered to their accommodation when they least expect it.

Plan visits when possible

If your partner is going to be away for a long time, they have multiple trips in a short space of time, or perhaps they’re going to a destination you really want to visit, then why not arrange a trip for yourself?

Try to plan your trip for when your partner has some downtime so that you can spend some quality time together. This will give you both something to look forward to, and you can explore new places and have new experiences together.

Be trusting and understanding

When your partner goes away a lot, it’s crucial you focus your efforts on building trust and avoid any feelings of jealousy or resentment towards them. This is especially true when they are travelling for work and are unable to cancel these trips.

You should acknowledge their work or travel commitments without making them feel guilty about them. Look at this as an exciting opportunity for them to grow and possibly even explore new places.

Have and discuss shared goals

Along with having your own goals and ambitions, it’s vital that you have some that you share; this is the cornerstone of any successful relationship.

Make sure to discuss your long-term plans for your relationship and goals for the future, for example, do you want children someday? That way, you can discuss how this would work around their absence, and you can work toward a future where travel won’t be a barrier to any shared ambitions.

Are you ready to make a strong connection?

If you’re still looking for that special connection, perhaps someone you can share your goals and travel plans with, you’re in the right place. Get in touch with our talented team of matchmakers today.

There’s something magical about the spring. The days are getting longer, the flowers are in bloom, and there’s a strong sense of rejuvenation in the air. 

This renewed sense of energy and positivity makes spring the perfect time to build new connections and embark on new journeys. 

So, if you’ve been waiting for the right moment to dive back into the dating world, here’s why spring is the ideal season to let romance blossom.

It’s the season of new beginnings 

Spring is often associated with new beginnings. Just as nature awakens after the cold winter, so do our emotions and desires. 

The fresh energy that it brings can inspire a renewed sense of optimism and excitement, making it easier to approach new people with an open mind and heart. 

If you’ve been hesitant about dating, hiding away through the tougher winter months, now is the time to shed those doubts and embrace the possibilities ahead.

It’s a mood boost for everyone

What’s more, the longer daylight hours and increased exposure to sunlight give our serotonin levels a much-needed boost after the winter.

This naturally makes us and those around us feel happier and more optimistic. This positive shift in mood makes it easier to engage with others and increases the likelihood of forming meaningful relationships. 

Because let’s face it, when everyone is feeling good, connections happen more naturally and you are more likely to find that spark. 

The weather is perfect for romantic outdoor dates

Not only are the days getting longer, but the weather is getting warmer, too. It’s time to shake off those heavy winter coats and get outside! 

Spring offers the perfect weather for lots of lovely, romantic outdoor dates. Whether it’s a picnic in the park, a nature walk, a stroll along your nearest beach or an adventurous hiking trip, there are countless ways to get outside and enjoy the change in weather. 

The warmth of the sun on your face and the cool spring breeze create an inviting atmosphere for meaningful conversations and deeper connections. Plus, with daylight extending into the evening, there’s more time to go on these dates and enjoy quality moments together.

There are more opportunities to be social 

As well as providing more opportunities for outdoor dates, the arrival of spring means people are naturally more inclined to go out and socialise or organise group activities. 

There are often more events taking place in your local area, from festivals and farmers’ markets to outdoor concerts and sports activities. This provides plenty of opportunities to socialise and meet new people. 

Spring fashion can be a real confidence boost

Spring fashion is all about bright colours, light, breezy fabrics and stylish outfits that make you feel good about yourself. 

After months of layering up in jumpers, coats, scarves and boots, stepping into a fresh, vibrant spring wardrobe can really boost your confidence and make you more open to new experiences. 

Not only that, but confidence is attractive and makes you feel stronger, and when you feel good about yourself, it becomes much easier to connect with others.

Nature is the best romantic backdrop

There’s a reason why so many love stories take place in the spring, as this season sets the stage for romance in the most beautiful way. 

Nature itself seems to encourage connection and affection. The flowers are in bloom, the birds are singing birds, and the lush greenery creates the ideal backdrop for romance. 

In spring, even a simple stroll through a botanical garden or an ice cream in the park can feel like you’re living a moment straight out of your favourite rom-com. 

Get ready to turn your spring fling into a lasting love

Many people who start dating in the spring find that the excitement and new connections carry on effortlessly into summer and beyond. 

So, if you’ve been waiting for a sign to start looking for love, let spring be your inspiration. With its fresh energy, outdoor date ideas and endless opportunities for connection, this season creates the perfect conditions to meet someone special. 

And if you need a little help getting started, get in touch with our talented team of matchmakers today. Offering expert advice and matchmaking services, they can support you on your dating journey this spring.

Falling in love is a universal human experience, yet its timing, process and emotional response vary hugely for every person. 

Despite this, as a society, we are obsessed with the notion of love at first sight and what relationship milestones we should be hitting each decade. 

So, while there is no definitive answer to the question ‘how long it takes to fall in love’, plenty of research has been conducted on the subject. 

At Ignite Dating, we firmly believe that love isn’t confined by time but this doesn’t mean it can’t be helpful to understand the science-backed insights on how long it takes to form a bond with someone new. 

This is especially true when you’re dating, enabling you to recognise if you’re going too fast or perhaps if your partner is going too slow and may not be ready to commit. 

So, how long does it actually take to fall in love?

There is no one right answer to how long it takes to fall in love. Everyone is different, and there are many factors that can impact how quickly you make that connection with someone and how soon you’re ready to express those feelings. 

However, lots of studies have been conducted over the years, and a particularly in-depth study from 2013 found that the average couple will confess their love between 88 days (for men) and 134 days (for women). 

That’s right, these findings also show that there is a distinct difference between men and women and how quickly each sex falls in love. 

Who typically says ‘I love you’ first? 

Multiple studies indicate that men typically fall in love more quickly than women. In fact, a recent study from 2025 found that men fall in love almost twice as fast as women. 

Based on the findings published in Biology of Sex Differences, the mean love progression score for females was 1.92 months, compared to 0.98 months in males, indicating that men fall in love almost twice as quickly. 

The study also found that despite the outdated stereotypes of women being emotional partners and men having a tough exterior, males are also likely to fall in love slightly more often than females do.

Does love at first sight exist? 

The notion of love at first sight is romantic but contentious, though an impressive 70% of people say that they believe in this phenomenon. 

However, over the years, psychology and medical professionals have suggested that what is often perceived as love at first is more likely to be immediate physical attraction rather than a real, deep emotional connection. 

Therefore, while people might feel a strong, immediate connection, developing true love typically requires time and deeper understanding, even if it is just a couple of months.

This is also backed by science, which found there are three key stages to falling in love: lust, attraction and attachment. Each stage is driven by different brain chemicals and hormones. These stages can vary in duration and may overlap based on the unique nature of every relationship.

Just remember, time doesn’t (and shouldn’t) limit love

While scientific studies can provide general guidelines, it’s so important to remember that love doesn’t adhere to a strict schedule. 

Some people may fall in love quickly, while others may take their time developing deep, meaningful connections. 

Factors such as personal experience, emotional readiness and individual differences will play a significant role in how and when love develops. So don’t rush yourself (or your partner) and don’t worry about checking off those invisible boxes on your relationship timeline. It’s better to let these connections develop naturally. 

And if you’re still looking for love right now, then why not let the Ignite Dating team help? Our services are backed by science too (MBTI and FIRO) and accredited Science Based Coaches along with an expert team and years of industry experience. So, get in touch today to find out how we can help you on your dating journey.

Have you ever found yourself thinking why your relationships always seem to follow a familiar pattern? 

You continuously fall for the wrong person, become attached and ignore every red flag along the way. Perhaps you keep dating the same type of person, facing the same arguments and feeling the same emotional letdown each time it doesn’t work out. 

It sounds like you’ve got dating déjà vu.   

This phenomenon reflects the subconscious patterns you have formed based on your past dating experiences and relationships. 

Understanding these patterns is the key to breaking those unhealthy cycles and building healthier, more fulfilling relationships in the future. 

Recognising relationship patterns

Patterns in relationships can often be subtle, but they reveal themselves through consistent behaviours, emotional responses or even the types of people we’re drawn to. 

Identifying these patterns is the first step toward understanding how they shape our romantic lives and how to avoid more unsuccessful relationships in the future. Some of the most common and destructive dating patterns include:

• Emotional unavailability: Repeatedly attracting or being drawn to partners who struggle to communicate their feelings or commit to you emotionally
• Conflict cycles: Finding yourself locked into the same old arguments across different relationships
• Rescue syndrome: Habitually taking on a caretaker role in your relationships and attempting to “fix” or support partners at the cost of your own well-being
• Idealising (or ignoring) their flaws: Falling for the same red flags, such as dismissive behaviour or constant unreliability, yet rationalising these behaviours as quirks or parts of their personality

It feels crazy believing that anyone would willingly keep putting up with these problems – and it is. The reality is that these patterns often arise from past experiences, whether from previous relationships or early family dynamics.

How these past experiences influence our dating patterns

Our early attachments and relationships shape our expectations, behaviours and emotional triggers. This conditioning, whether from partners, friends or family can unconsciously dictate how we approach intimacy, trust and vulnerability in our adult life. 

Attachment styles 

Attachment styles are developed during childhood and influence how we connect with others. For example, someone who grew up in an unstable household and has an anxious attachment may unknowingly gravitate toward avoidant partners, leading to cycles of emotional instability.

Emotional baggage

This one can feel a bit of a cliche, but it’s a real problem. Unresolved pain or issues from past breakups, betrayals or disappointments can create defensive behaviours or self-sabotage in future relationships.

Unrealistic expectations

Similarly, past relationships may shape your beliefs about what love and relationships should look like. This can go one of two ways, sometimes leading to overly romanticised ideas of love that are often unattainable. 

On the other hand, you may have deeper-rooted issues that leave you with low self-esteem or the belief that you should not be treated as an equal within the relationship. 

How to break these unhealthy patterns

You might already recognise that you follow some of these patterns, but identifying them is only half the battle. Breaking them requires conscious effort, self-reflection and healthy decision-making. To do this, you can:

Increase your self-awareness and reflection

It can be helpful to keep a diary or take part in therapy or mindfulness practices that enable you to identify recurring themes in your dating history. Reflecting on your emotional triggers and relationship outcomes can reveal underlying patterns and how to avoid them in the future. 

Challenge familiarity

People often mistake familiarity for comfort, which can lead to repeating the same relationship dynamics.

So, before you become emotionally attached to someone new, actively question what draws you to that person – is it a genuine connection or a subconscious repetition of past experiences?

Set clear boundaries

Establishing healthy boundaries can prevent you from falling back into toxic cycles. Learn to say no to behaviours that have caused you pain in previous relationships, and don’t be afraid to speak up. 

Therapy and support

Professional guidance can help you to uncover the deeper issues that are driving your relationship patterns. Accredited Date Coaches can then introduce strategies for developing healthier attachment styles and communication skills.

Re-evaluate your core beliefs

Sometimes, we carry limiting beliefs such as “I don’t deserve better” or “Relationships are always hard and at least I have someone”. By challenging these mindsets, you can open the door to healthier dynamics and better relationships. 

Work with dating professionals 

You don’t have to go on this journey alone. Choosing to work with expert matchmakers can help you to recognise and avoid these damaging patterns and they will guide you and help you manage them in a safe and healthy way. They will get to know you on a deeper level to help you find someone better suited to your wants and needs.

Embracing positive change in future relationships

Does breaking these old patterns mean your dating life will be flawless?

Of course, not. But it does empower you to make better choices and respond to challenges with greater emotional resilience. It also empowers you to walk away from detrimental relationships before they go too far. 

By embracing personal growth and challenging your comfort zone, you create space for healthier relationships built on genuine connections, trust and emotional security.

And don’t be ashamed if this all sounds familiar; experiencing dating déjà vu is common, and it doesn’t have to dictate your romantic future. If you’re ready to break free of old patterns and find the right match, get in touch today with our talented team of matchmakers today.

Dating can be fun and exciting; getting to know new people and feeling those butterflies with each message and each meeting.

But for most people, the end goal is a healthy, long-term relationship built on mutual goals and genuine connections. 

The only way to find long-lasting love like this is to distinguish between your wants and needs in a relationship and take this on board when dating. 

Understanding the difference between the two can help you to build healthier, more fulfilling connections while avoiding unnecessary heartache.

But how do you make sure you get this right? 

Understanding what you need from a relationship

Your needs are the fundamental aspects required for a healthy, happy and long-lasting relationship. They are non-negotiable and essential for your well-being. 

If these needs are not met, the likelihood is that your relationship will be unfulfilling, and it could even be damaging. Some of the most common relationship needs include:

• Emotional support
• Trust and honesty
• Compatibility in core values for major life choices and ambitions
• Mutual effort, communication and commitment 
• Respect 
• Physical and emotional safety

Without these elements, a relationship is less likely to stand the test of time, and you’re more likely to be dissatisfied with your partner and relationship. 

Understanding what you want from a relationship 

Unlike your needs, the things you want from a partner are preferences that may enhance your relationship, but they are not essential for its success. 

Sure, they can contribute to attraction and enjoyment, but they should not override your core needs. Some examples of what you might want include:

• Physical traits and a specific appearance that is attractive to you 
• Similar hobbies and interests
• Financial status
• Social status or popularity

These aspects might be nice to have and can contribute towards a better relationship; however, they do not equal a safe, mutually respectful and successful partnership. They only enhance it if and when your basic needs are being met. 

How to differentiate between the two 

Recognising the difference between your wants and needs can help you make more intentional choices when dating. But, in case you’re unsure how to differentiate between the two, you should:

Reflect on your past relationships

Think about what made you feel truly happy and secure in past relationships and what it was that led to its eventual downfall. For example, were they fit and athletic and shared your love for TV, but there wasn’t healthy communication, and they never listened to you?

If that’s the case, then you need to focus on finding someone who is emotionally available to fulfil your needs. And if they share your love of crime series and playing tennis, well, that’s a bonus! 

Make a list

Take some time to write down what you believe are your absolute needs in a partner versus your ideal preferences. Those you could take or leave, as long as the core needs were being met. 

This list should include your deal breakers. These traits or values would genuinely affect your long-term happiness and well-being. 

Consider growth and adaptability 

Your wants may evolve over time, while your core needs are likely to stay the same. So don’t be afraid to re-evaluate your wants and consider how you’ve grown and changed since your last relationship. 

Seek balance

Finally, while it’s okay to have wants and desires, you should never compromise on your fundamental needs for the sake of fulfilling a want. So, try to get the balance just right. 

Look for someone who is ticking those fundamental boxes first before looking at those more superficial aspects. Of course, we’re not saying that attraction and personal traits aren’t important, but these need to be balanced with your core needs. 

By prioritising what truly matters in this way, you can attract a partner who aligns with your values and leads to a fulfilling, lasting relationship. 

At Ignite Dating, we understand that differentiating between the two can be tricky, which is why we work closely with our clients to understand what they need before matching this with what they want.  

By getting to know you on a deeper level, we can help you to get the balance just right and find the perfect match. So, if you’re ready to get your dating journey off to the best possible start, get in touch with our talented team today. 

Have you heard of the ’36 Questions to Fall in Love’ theory?

You may well have, as it is not new. In fact, it was an experiment developed by psychologist Arthur Aron in 1997, and it gained widespread attention in 2015 after being featured in an article in the New York Times. 

And now, just like waist chains, butterfly clips and matching tracksuits, this theory has become popular again in 2025. 

But what is the 36 questions theory, and how can it help you on your dating journey? 

The ‘36 questions to fall in love’ theory

The theory is a psychological experiment designed to create emotional intimacy between two people through a structured conversation. It was originally created to explore how emotional closeness between strangers can be accelerated through mutual sharing. 

The idea is that by answering increasingly personal questions, individuals can develop a deeper sense of understanding, trust and connection with one another, potentially leading to romantic feelings.

That is why this can be such a great tool when you’re dating. Not to mention, it can be a great icebreaker! 

Although, it might be one you want to save for the second or third date. 

How these 36 questions work

It’s not just about the rattling of 36 random questions. Instead, these fixed questions are divided into three sets, with each set becoming progressively deeper and more personal. 

The idea behind this structure is that as the questions unfold, individuals will gradually become more vulnerable and open with one another. 

The process typically ends with four minutes of uninterrupted eye contact, which is believed to enhance feelings of closeness. But you might wish to forgo this if it feels a little too intense in the early stages.

Some examples of the questions include:

• If you could have dinner with anyone in the world, who would it be?
• What is your most treasured memory?
• What is your greatest fear?
• When did you last cry in front of someone else?

As you can see, the questions start off relatively simple but eventually touch on deeper emotions, personal insecurities and significant life moments. 

As you answer these questions and listen to the other person’s responses, you’ll both engage in mutual vulnerability, which is a key element in building emotional intimacy.

Does it work?

While the 36 Questions experiment can help to facilitate conversation and closeness, for obvious reasons, it does not guarantee you’ll fall in love. This theory does not replace the deeper aspects of building a relationship, such as shared values, long-term compatibility and real-life experiences together.

That said, it can help you on your dating journey because it creates an intimate environment and encourages you both to open up emotionally and to be vulnerable with one another. 

This can accelerate intimacy as you share stories, memories, ambitions and truths that it might otherwise take months to share with each other. And as if all that wasn’t enough, these questions also give you talking points for in-person dates and any text conversations that follow. 

So, despite there being no guarantee, these questions do offer a great starting point when you’re dating. They can be an excellent way to get to know someone and to open up to them, and who knows, it might even lead to your true love. 

You can check out the full 36 questions in this Cosmopolitan guide. For more dating advice and help finding love this year, get in touch with our team of matchmakers today. 

Navigating the world of modern dating can be very exciting; those first flirtatious glances, planning the first date, getting butterflies in your stomach every time your phone pings. 

You know the feeling. 

But it can also be nerve-wracking and even overwhelming.

Should you message them first? What should your first message say? Where should you go and what should you do for your first date? What should you wear? 

There’s so much to consider in those early stages if you want to make a lasting impression, pave the way for a meaningful connection and, yes, secure a second date. 

So how do you make yourself stand out in a sea of potential partners?  

Well, we’re going to share some advice on getting it right from the very first message to saying goodbye at the end of your first date. 

Crafting the perfect first message

It doesn’t matter how you met, whether that was through mutual friends, a chance happening on the street or through a matchmaking service like Ignite Dating, your first message exchange can feel high pressure. 

Don’t make the mistake of sending something generic that can be ignored, like ‘Hey’ or ‘This is Tom’. These messages don’t exactly ignite that spark or encourage them to reply. Instead, it’s better to be more personal and specific, tapping into any information you already know about them. 

For example, if you know that they enjoy good coffee, ask them where their favourite coffee place is. This is also a great way to start lining up a venue  for a first date. 

Well-placed humour or a joke is also a great first step because who doesn’t love someone who makes them laugh? 

Just make sure that you keep your messages short and engaging. No one wants to read an essay, especially from someone they’ve just met. 

Keeping the conversation flowing

Once you’ve got their attention, you want to maintain an engaging conversation over the coming days before the first date. To do this, you should ask open-ended questions and share personal stories or anecdotes. This will build rapport and help you get to know one another. 

Just be careful to avoid overloading them with messages and follow-ups. Give them space to reply and let the conversation flow naturally.

It’s also important to recognise when it’s time to move on to the next step. Don’t let the conversation fizzle out into just another textual exchange. Once you’ve established a comfortable rapport with them, it might be time to suggest a first date. 

Asking for the first date

When planning the first date, timing is everything. Too soon, and you might come across as pushy; too late, and you both may have lost interest. 

With that in mind, the best time to ask is after you’ve established a fun and engaging conversation. When you do ask them, make sure to be confident but casual and give a specific but flexible plan. 

For example, you could suggest a specific activity or place to go whilst giving them the opportunity to choose the date and time. 

If they seem hesitant or have a busy schedule, don’t push them for an answer. A polite “No worries, let me know if you’d like to go another time” keeps things open-ended. If they’re truly interested in meeting you, they’ll get back to you to get more formal plans in place. 

Making a great impression on the first date

Now that the date is set, the next step is ensuring everything goes well.

It doesn’t matter what you decide to do or where you’re going, whether it’s dinner in the evening or a walk around the local park at lunchtime, you need to make a good impression if you hope to secure another date. 

In order to do this, you need to:

• Be punctual – Never leave them waiting, and if you are late for reasons out of your control, make sure to contact them and keep them updated on the situation until you arrive. 
• Dress appropriately – What you wear will depend on the activity, but it’s important that whatever you’re doing, you look well-presented and put together. Looking like you haven’t made any effort just won’t do it, even if you’re going on a muddy dog walk or just grabbing a quick coffee.
• Keep the conversation balanced – You don’t want your first date to feel like an interview; you also don’t want to dominate the conversation. So, make sure to actively listen to them and offer thoughtful questions or responses. 
• Avoid contentious subjects –  Similarly, there are some topics you should probably avoid on the first day, topics such as politics, unless, of course, this is a shared interest. 
• Choose the right venue – Opt for a place that allows for easy conversation or choose fun activities that you’re both interested in. Loud bars or crowded restaurants can be stressful and make it hard to have an enjoyable conversation with one another. 
• Be mindful of your body language – During the date, maintain good eye contact, smile naturally and use open body language to show you’re interested. Avoid crossing your arms or looking at your phone frequently, as this suggests you’re not all that interested in what they have to say. 

Ending on a positive note

If the date goes well, make sure to express how much you enjoyed spending time with them without going over the top. 

A simple “I had a great time today. Let’s do this again soon” should suffice. 

If you’re interested in a second date, it’s also a good idea to follow up within a day or two with a message reiterating what a nice time you had. This will increase your chances of getting a second date in the diary. 

Are you ready to put yourself out there?

Making a lasting impression from the first message to the first date involves authenticity, confidence and effort.

Of course, you have to meet that special someone and exchange numbers first. So, if you’re looking for love and genuine connection this year, get in touch with our team of talented matchmakers today and you could be arranging your first date in no time.