Author: Lis Jones

We often imagine (and let’s face it, hope) that when you meet the right person, you’ll feel that instant spark and it’ll be love at first sight.

And yes, this has happened in our younger years, but in reality, it can take a little longer to form that genuine connection as we get older. 

The challenge is, when you’re looking for love, you don’t want to invest months of your time into a relationship that’s going nowhere. It might seem harsh, but it’s a simple truth. 

So, we’re here to uncover how long you should wait for the spark to develop and when it might be time to call it quits. 

​​Immediate attraction Vs. a gradual connection

When they first meet, some lucky people may feel an instant connection – but this is usually based on lust and sexual attraction, rather than being the foundation of a longstanding relationship. But this isn’t the only indicator of compatibility. Don’t be disheartened if you don’t fall in ‘love’  on the first date, by having three dates  you may find a gradual spark begins to build.

This can happen as you get to know each other, particularly if you value emotional and intellectual compatibility over simple physical attraction. Sometimes, the more you get to know about someone, the more that flame builds. 

So how many dates should you go on?

While there is no one right answer, the most common window to find out whether there’s potential is one to three dates. By the third date, most people will have a clearer sense of their feelings and whether they believe a spark is developing. 

If by the third time you meet them, you’re still not smitten but you’re enjoying their company, give it a few more dates. Sometimes that spark takes a little longer to build, and if you enjoy their company, then don’t give up too soon. 

If you’re not feeling any chemistry or romantic interest by the fifth or sixth date, this is usually a pretty big sign. At this stage, it’s better to be honest with them and continue your search for that spark elsewhere. 

The key things you need to consider 

As we’ve said, there is no exact science as to how long that spark takes to develop, and that’s why it’s important to always do what’s best for you. However, as trained experts in dating advice, we’ve put together some key points to consider that can help you make the right decision:

Enjoyment – Do you look forward to seeing them, and are you enjoying the time you spend together? If so, this is a good sign even if strong romantic feelings haven’t developed yet 

Openness – Are you both being authentic and open with one another? Sometimes vulnerability and honesty can unlock deeper feelings

Physical attraction – Although looks aren’t everything, physical attraction is important, and if this is absent and not developing, it can be hard for a romantic connection to form

Shared values and goals – If your values and goals align, it is usually worth giving the relationship a little more time to develop to see what happens 

Always trust your instincts 

What it really comes down to is how you feel, and if you feel pressure to force feelings and find a connection, it may not be the right match. But if you’re enjoying the process and there’s mutual respect and curiosity, give it some time. It might just take a couple of dates for that spark to really grow. 

Ultimately, all relationships develop at different paces. So, if you share common interests and goals, it’s okay to take your time to see if a deeper connection forms. But don’t string them (or yourself) along if you don’t feel any sort of connection, especially if you’ve already met several times. 

Be honest with the other person (and yourself), move on and continue your quest for the perfect partner, one that lights a fire within you and lets those sparks shine bright. 

Are you looking for that special someone but haven’t found them yet? Then we can help. Get in touch with our talented team of matchmakers today, and let’s see if we can make those sparks fly.

You might have heard the term ‘cuffing season’ before. You might have even found yourself craving relationships and affection more during the colder months. 

But if you’re not familiar with this trend, the term ‘cuffing season’ refers to the winter months, when the weather gets colder, and we naturally spend more time indoors. As a result, we are more likely to crave companionship. Think big cosy blankets, crackling fireplaces, festive evenings out at Christmas markets and warming cups of mulled wine. 

Who wouldn’t feel more romantic at this time of year? 

But while cuffing season might sound like a heartwarming prospect, resembling the end credits of a festive rom-com, it is not without its challenges. 

Why cuffing season is potentially problematic when you’re looking for love 

When you’re looking for a relationship, the idea of lots of other individuals also looking for love sounds like a good thing, right? 

The trouble is, ‘cuffing’ generally refers to a temporary mindset, with many approaching this season as a way of having companionship for just a few months. This is not always good news if you’re looking for something long-term. Cuffing season also has some other potential pitfalls, as the desire for warmth and comfort can lead to clouded judgements. This increased pressure to pair up, often without fully considering compatibility, can cause you to overlook red flags or mismatched values. 

Not only this, but festive stress in the build-up to Christmas and New Year can lead to increased pressure to find a partner, the ‘do I, don’t I’ of gifting-giving, and those premature ‘meet the family’ moments. 

Lastly, focusing on short-term dating during cuffing season can take your time and energy away from finding someone who truly aligns with your long-term goals. Entering a relationship purely for comfort can distract you from finding a partner who is a genuine match. 

So, while it might feel very magical, romanticising this season can create a false sense of connection that quickly fades when the season ends. 

Tips for dating during cuffing season and using this to your advantage 

With many more people out there looking for comfort and companionship at this time of year, cuffing season is arguably one of the best times to look for a partner. 

However, you don’t want to leave yourself vulnerable to those who are only in it for the short term – unless that is what you want, of course. 

If you’re looking for a genuine, long-term connection, make sure to keep these expert tips in mind during the colder months:

Be open and honest about your intentions 

Before you dive into the seasonal dating pool, it’s important to reflect on whether you’re looking for a seasonal fling, a long-term relationship or simply companionship. 

You then need to communicate this clearly, letting any potential matches know your intentions. This avoids any mismatched expectations or possible upsets on both sides. 

Focus on building genuine connections

Despite there typically being a bigger dating pool at this time of year, it’s best to invest time in fewer people rather than juggling multiple of casual dates. 

This gives you the opportunity to go beyond surface-level conversations, discussing values, long-term goals and future aspirations.

Embrace seasonal activities

This time of year offers plenty of opportunities for fun and cosy activities, so why not make the most of it? 

You can plan dates around activities you’ll both enjoy, such as light displays, holiday concerts, festive baking, movie marathons or Christmas markets. 

Work with the experts 

Dating apps will be bursting with singles looking for someone to ‘cuff’ with during this cosy season, which is why it’s better to avoid these platforms. 

Instead, work with expert matchmakers to ensure you’re matched with like-minded people who are also looking for a committed relationship, not just someone to keep them warm in the winter months.  

Don’t rush your dating journey 

Beware of settling just because it’s cuffing season. It can be emotionally damaging pairing up with someone incompatible and it can set back your dating journey

Instead, pace yourself and take the time to get to know them and build a meaningful connection, rather than rushing into something just to avoid being alone. 

As part of this, you should resist the temptation to lower your standards. Just because it’s cuffing season, you should avoid seasonal pressure and stick to what you know you need in a long-term partner.

Prioritise your own self-care

Finally, it’s crucial that you stay balanced and don’t lose yourself in the process of finding love.

Be mindful of your own emotional availability and encourage communication so that you can steer clear of anyone who seems more interested in avoiding loneliness than in building a real connection.

Self-care is so important at this time of year, especially when you’re on a dating journey. By putting our tips in place, you will find the right person for you that will last into the warmer months. 

If you’re looking for love this cuffing season and you want some help building genuine connections with like-minded people, get in touch with our expert team of matchmakers today.

Anyone who’s seen the 2007 film P.S. I Love You with Gerard Butler and Hilary Swank, will have already witnessed the charm that the Republic of Ireland has to offer. Renowned for its breathtaking landscapes, charming towns, and rich culture, whether you’re looking for adventure, tranquillity, or a combination of the two, the Republic of Ireland offers countless opportunities for romantic experiences. Below are just some of the date ideas in the region that promise to leave you and your date with unforgettable memories.

Stroll along the Cliffs of Moher

Located in County Clare, the Cliffs of Moher are an easy day trip from many parts of the Republic of Ireland and a must-see for couples who love nature. These iconic cliffs offer stunning views of the Atlantic Ocean and the rugged Irish coastline. You can walk along the cliff edge (safely, of course), take in the crashing waves below, and enjoy the fresh sea air as you find out more about each other. Then finish the day with a cosy dinner at one of the nearby restaurants in Doolin, a village famous for its traditional Irish music and lively atmosphere.

Kayaking in Kinsale Harbour

Kinsale, a picturesque harbour town in County Cork, is perfect for couples who enjoy a mix of adventure and charm. One of the most unique and exciting date ideas is to go kayaking around Kinsale Harbour. Paddle through the calm waters, explore hidden coves, and take in the stunning views of the colourful townhouses along the shore. After working up an appetite, treat yourselves to some delicious seafood at one of the town’s famous restaurants, like Fishy Fishy, known for its fresh, locally sourced ingredients.

Visit Blarney Castle and Gardens

Located just outside Cork City, Blarney Castle is home to the legendary Blarney Stone, which is said to bestow the gift of eloquence on anyone who kisses it. But even if you’re not up for puckering up to a stone, the castle and its surrounding gardens are an incredibly romantic setting. Wander through the stunning gardens, explore the magical Rock Close with its ancient yew trees and druidic stones, and take in the views from the castle’s towers. The peaceful surroundings offer a perfect backdrop for a leisurely afternoon, with plenty of spots for a quiet picnic too.

Sunset at Inch Beach, County Kerry

If you’re looking for a beach date that’s a bit more serene, head to Inch Beach in County Kerry. This long stretch of golden sand is perfect for a romantic evening walk. It’s an ideal spot to catch the sunset with the Dingle Peninsula in the distance, creating a dramatic and stunning view. Bring a blanket and perhaps a bottle of wine and enjoy the peaceful sounds of the ocean as the sun dips below the horizon.

Explore the Ring of Kerry

If you love road trips and exploring new places then a trip along the famous Ring of Kerry, for a full day of exploration and stunning views should be on the cards. This 179-kilometer circular route offers endless breathtaking landscapes, from mountains to lakes and even beaches. Stop off at places like the Gap of Dunloe, Ladies View, and Torc Waterfall to stretch your legs and truly take in the natural beauty. And don’t worry, there are also plenty of quaint villages along the way where you can stop for a meal or a pint of Guinness if you’re truly feeling the Irish spirit! 

Enjoy traditional music in Dingle

If you’re both music lovers then you won’t want to bypass Dingle, a lively town on the edge of the Dingle Peninsula, known for its vibrant music scene. Make the most of an evening date by paying a visit to one of the traditional Irish pubs like O’Sullivan’s Courthouse Pub, where you can enjoy live traditional music sessions before taking a moonlit stroll along the harbour. The combination of great music, tasty food, and a beautiful backdrop makes for a truly memorable date.

Hiking in Killarney National Park

For couples who enjoy the great outdoors, a hike in Killarney National Park is a perfect date. The park offers a variety of trails, from easy walks to more challenging hikes. Explore the picturesque Muckross House and Gardens, take a boat trip to Innisfallen Island, or hike up to the Torc Waterfall. The park is full of stunning lakes, woodlands, and mountains, providing plenty of opportunities for quiet moments together in nature.

Spa day in Kenmare

If relaxation is more your style, a spa day in Kenmare, County Kerry, is the perfect way to unwind with your date. Many luxury hotels in the area, such as the Park Hotel Kenmare, offer couples’ spa packages that include massages, thermal suites, and access to serene pools. After a day of pampering, take a stroll through the charming town of Kenmare, which is known for its vibrant art galleries and excellent dining options, to truly indulge in the Irish culture.

The Republic of Ireland offers a wealth of romantic date ideas, blending adventure, culture, and relaxation. Whether you’re wandering along scenic coastal cliffs or enjoying a cosy evening in a traditional pub, these experiences are sure to create cherished memories for you and your date. So, grab your partner and start exploring the beauty and charm of the country!

If you’re based in the Republic of Ireland and looking for a new way to date, then get in touch with our team today to find out more about how we can help on your search for love.

Northern Ireland has played host as a famous backdrop for many romantic movies and novels over the years and it’s easy to see why. The country’s stunning mix of natural beauty, historical sites, and unique experiences, make it the perfect setting for unforgettable dates. Whether you’re into outdoor adventures, cosy evenings, or cultural explorations, there’s something for every couple to enjoy in Northern Ireland. Here are some date ideas to inspire you and your date to make the most of this captivating country.

Sunset stroll at Giant’s Causeway

If you love to mix romance with a touch of myth and history, visiting the Giant’s Causeway is a must. This National Trust heritage site, famous for its hexagonal basalt columns, offers breathtaking views of the North Atlantic Ocean and if you time your visit around sunset, you’re sure to witness a beautiful magical glow over the landscape. After your walk along the causeway, why not visit nearby Bushmills for a cosy meal in one of the village’s quaint pubs or restaurants.

Explore the walled city of Derry

For history buffs, the city of Derry (officially Londonderry) provides a rich cultural experience. Take a leisurely walk together around the historic city walls, which date back to the 17^th century. These walls are among the best-preserved in Europe, offering views of the city and the River Foyle below. Afterward, visit the Guildhall, a beautiful neo-Gothic building, or grab coffee in the quirky Craft Village. To finish off the day, catch a live music gig in one of the city’s many bars. Derry has a vibrant arts and cultural scene, so you’re bound to find something happening every night.

Picnic at the Dark Hedges

If you and your partner are fans of Game of Thrones, a visit to the Dark Hedges is a perfect idea. This avenue of ancient beech trees, made famous by the TV series, is one of the most photographed spots in Northern Ireland. Pack a picnic with your favourite treats, find a quiet spot under the sprawling branches, and enjoy the eerie yet enchanting beauty of the place. It’s a peaceful, romantic setting that’s ideal for couples looking to escape into nature.

Adventure at the Mourne Mountains

For the active couple, a day spent hiking in the Mourne Mountains offers an invigorating date experience. With trails ranging from easy to challenging, the Mournes provide stunning panoramic views of Northern Ireland’s rolling hills and coastline. After working up a sweat, reward yourselves with a hearty meal at a local pub, such as The Maghera Inn, or cosy up by a fire in one of the area’s charming guesthouses. If you’re feeling particularly adventurous, you could even book a couple’s camping trip and spend the night under the stars.

Tour the Titanic Quarter in Belfast

For something more urban, a date in Belfast’s Titanic Quarter offers a mix of history and modern experiences. Start with a visit to the Titanic Belfast Museum, where you can learn about the city’s shipbuilding heritage and the tragic story of the Titanic. Afterward, stroll along the waterfront, stopping at the SS Nomadic, the last remaining White Star Line ship. End your day with a romantic dinner at Bert’s Jazz Bar, where you can enjoy cocktails and live jazz in a glamorous, vintage setting.

Spa day in the Slieve Donard Resort

For the ultimate relaxation date, book a spa day at the Slieve Donard Resort & Spa, located at the foot of the Mourne Mountains and overlooking the sea. You can both unwind with a couple’s massage, enjoy the luxurious thermal spa, or simply relax in the stunning surroundings. After a day of pampering, enjoy dinner at the hotel’s award-winning restaurant, which offers fine dining with breathtaking views of the coast.

Northern Ireland’s diverse landscapes and rich cultural heritage provide endless opportunities for memorable dates. Whether you’re exploring historic cities, embarking on outdoor adventures, or indulging in fine dining and pamper days, Northern Ireland promises romance and enchantment at every turn. So, grab your partner and embark on a Northern Ireland adventure that will leave you both spellbound.

If you’re based in Northern Ireland and looking for a new way to date, then get in touch with our team today to find out more about how we can help on your search for love.

Would you talk about your therapy experiences with a potential partner? While it may be the scene of nightmares for a lot of us, the openness of discussing therapy experiences on dates is a notable trend with no signs of slowing down. A recent survey highlights that many daters now seek partners who are willing to share their therapy journeys. But what is driving the trend and how open is too open when it comes to finding someone new?

The rise of therapy conversations

Discussing mental health, particularly therapy, was once considered taboo in social settings, let alone on dates. However, this has changed significantly. Recent years have witnessed a broader cultural acceptance of mental health care and its benefits. With many people now viewing therapy as a valuable tool for personal growth and relationship success. 

But where does that leave you when it comes to dating?

While the trend indicates a growing appreciation for emotional intelligence and self-awareness in romantic relationships, it also helps strengthen the foundation of any romantic connections that you have. 

Fostering openness and vulnerability

Sharing therapy experiences can create a foundation of trust and openness between you and your date. Not only does it allow partners to understand each other’s emotional landscapes better, but it also gives a clearer picture of your boundaries and why you may feel a certain way. While sharing can foster open communication between you both, be aware that oversharing can put people off. It’s much better to give small doses of information over time than use the date as another therapy session to offload everything. 

Promoting mental health awareness

Normalising therapy discussion helps reduce the stigma around mental health and encourages both partners to prioritise their emotional wellbeing. Taking time for yourself to look after your physical and mental wellbeing is necessary in today’s fast-paced world. By setting these expectations from the beginning, you can ensure a healthier and more open relationship both with yourself and your potential partner. 

Enhancing relationship quality

Couples who discuss their therapy journeys often navigate conflicts more effectively. They have each spent a lot of time working on themselves and as a result have learnt to open up to a stranger and communicate their feelings in a healthy way. They are more likely to develop healthy communication patterns from the start. Patterns that will in turn strengthen the foundations of the relationships and enable them to navigate and talk through even the most trying of situations together. 

While there are some clear benefits to opening the channels when it comes to therapy discussions with a potential partner, knowing how and when to bring it up is key. If you’re new to this trend and wondering how to bring it up in a date context, here are some practical tips:

Choose the right moment

Timing is crucial. Find a relaxed and private setting to initiate the conversation. The first date is probably not the place to start, instead open the communication channels once you feel more comfortable with that person and are open to the prospect of a future commitment with them. 

Be honest and respectful

Share your experiences sincerely and encourage your date to do the same but respect their boundaries. Whether they’ve been through therapy or not, not everyone is comfortable talking about their mental health. Don’t apply any pressure or push them to tell you more than they are willing to. 

Focus on personal growth

Therapy happens when we are often at our most vulnerable. Rather than focus on the negative situations that led you there, highlight how therapy has helped you grow and improve as a person. Focus on the skills that it has taught you and what you have learnt about yourself. 

Listen actively

Pay attention to your date’s reactions and be open to their perspective. Just as not everyone is open to talking about therapy, some people do not feel comfortable hearing about it. Take note of how your date is reacting and be careful not to share too much too soon. It’s better to give little bits of information over time than overwhelm them in one go. The right person will respect the value you place on your own mental wellbeing and share your values and emotional maturity. 

The trend of discussing therapy on dates is not just a passing fad; it reflects a deeper shift towards valuing mental health and emotional honesty in relationships. As more people embrace this openness, the dating landscape will continue to evolve, fostering healthier and more meaningful connections. Whether you’re navigating the dating world on your own or with the help of a matchmaker, being transparent about your therapy experiences can pave the way for a fulfilling and supportive relationship.

If you’re single and looking to build a stronger, more authentic relationship with someone who shares your values, lifestyle and aspirations for the future, then get in touch with our team of expert matchmakers today.