It’s disheartening that in 2025, ghosting has become a hallmark of modern dating. As if the search for love wasn’t hard enough, the ability for a potential partner to simply cut you off with no warning or explanation can be draining.
And if you’ve been left staring at your phone waiting for a message that never comes, you’ll know how confusing and frustrating it can be. Especially if this has happened on multiple occasions.
However, don’t be fooled into thinking this is your fault. Ultimately, you cannot control the behaviour of others, but what you can control is how you respond to it. Managing ghosting is all about understanding why it happens and protecting yourself, so you can move on to the next potential partner with clarity and confidence.
What does ghosting really mean?
One of the most important aspects to understand about ghosting is that it says more about the other person than it does about you.
People will ghost people for a number of reasons. This could be an avoidant attachment style, fear of confrontation, emotional immaturity or simply not knowing how to express that they don’t want to move it forward, respectfully.
Sadly, in today’s fast-paced, dating app-driven world, many people view relationships as disposable or easily replaceable. This can make disappearing without an explanation seem easier than having a difficult conversation.
It’s simple; you just don’t reply to their message or arrange to meet them ever again. Job done.
Of course, that doesn’t make ghosting OK, but it does mean you shouldn’t internalise this as a slight on you.
Someone else’s inability to communicate maturely is not a reflection of your worth and, in fact, proves to you early on that they are not going to be the right person for you.
So, if you’ve been ghosted recently, remind yourself of this: rejection is redirection. If someone doesn’t have the courage to be open and honest with you, they’re not the kind of person you want to date anyway, and you’re better off without them in your life.
Allow yourself the appropriate amount of time to feel disappointed
When someone ghosts you, it’s OK to feel hurt or confused. You might start questioning your behaviour and overthinking your last interaction, searching for some clue as to what you did wrong.
While a little reflection is natural and healthy, it’s important that you don’t dwell on these feelings and spiral into over-analysis and self-blame.
You are not the problem here; they are. So, take a moment to acknowledge your feelings, perhaps write them down or talk to a friend about what happened, and then let them go. Yes, it’s important to process these emotions, but you don’t want to let this negative experience impact your future dates or connections.
Resist the urge to search for answers
Although it can be tricky to simply move on because you deserve an explanation, try to avoid sending follow-up messages and seeking answers. Sometimes looking for closure can do more harm than good and calling or messaging them to ask what has changed for them, usually leads to more unanswered texts or less than satisfactory answers.
If someone has already chosen to ignore you, the chances are they’ll continue to do so in order to avoid confrontation.
So, instead of chasing explanations from them, give yourself the closure they didn’t, by acknowledging and accepting what’s happened and taking positive steps forward. It’s important that you protect your peace and don’t let them knock your confidence.
Reframe ghosting as redirection
Try to look at ghosting as an opportunity in disguise. Would you want to be in a long-term relationship with someone who lacks emotional intelligence and can’t communicate effectively?
Unlikely, so view this as a way of making room for someone better suited to you. Every ghosting experience can teach you something about what you want from a partner, what you can tolerate, and how to set clearer boundaries on your dating journey.
For example, you might learn to pay more attention to their communication style and emotional availability early on. Although you can’t control whether someone ghosts you, you can control how quickly you recognise red flags like this next time.
Strengthen your self-worth
When someone ghosts you, it can trigger insecurities. It can leave you asking, “Why wasn’t I enough?” or “Did I do something wrong?” But remember, your value doesn’t fluctuate based on someone else’s ability to communicate.
Remind yourself of your qualities, achievements, and what makes you so great. Engage in activities that make you feel grounded and happy. The stronger your sense of self-worth, the less power ghosting will have over you now and in the future.
Set healthier expectations when dating
Finally, you can’t prevent ghosting, but you can change how you approach it in your dating journey. Make sure to set clear expectations early on about communication and respect. If someone’s energy and behaviour feels inconsistent, make sure to take note and address this, rather than making excuses for them.
And remember, it’s okay to walk away from people who don’t meet your emotional needs. Just as long as you don’t ghost them, of course!
Yes, being ghosted hurts, but it doesn’t define you. It’s a reflection of someone else’s emotional limitations, not your shortcomings. So, honour yourself by reinforcing boundaries and prioritising self-respect. Turn what feels like rejection into a lesson in resilience and self-worth.
And if you need any guidance or support on your dating journey, our team can help you find the right matches. To find out more, get in touch with our expert matchmakers today.
