Why you should be realistic when dating

From a very young age we start thinking about our perfect partner and while they may evolve and tweak slightly as we grow and our tastes and personalities change, they very rarely stray too far from the original. But how realistic are you about dating and your proposed match?

While basing your ideal partner on a swoon-worthy actor or glamorous supermodel may help you visualise the type of person that you are looking for, realistically your perfect partner is likely to be miles apart from what you initially thought. Think about it, if you were to take your celebrity crush how many of your previous partners looked or even acted like that person? Probably, none.

When it comes to dating you need to be realistic. If you have a long checklist of traits that a partner has to meet it is highly unlikely that you will ever find the one that you are looking for – simply because they do not exist. At some point we need to compromise and really think about the things that are important – the values, aspirations and lifestyle that are compatible to your own.

How many times have you ruled somebody out because they were a few inches shorter than your ideal or a few years older, even though the rest of their profile sounded great? By fixating on that one element, you could be shutting out the perfect partner for you all for the sake of a number on a page.

As we get older things change and the traits and qualities that are most important to us take on a more pivotal role in our decision making. While you may still be attracting younger matches, you have to consider where that relationship will lead long-term. As the age-old saying goes, beauty fades but personality is forever, so when you are next considering a match think about the compatibility as well as the attraction because ultimately you need to ensure that there is more to your relationship than the physical aspects of a person such as looks, age or height.

How to be realistic when dating.

This is where a matchmaker can really help. Working with a matchmaker can push your boundaries and help change your mindset on what you are looking for. Of course, you need to find your partner attractive and share the same dreams and goals for the future, but you also need to be realistic and open-minded and not turn someone down simply because they don’t tick all the boxes on your checklist.

A matchmaker is able to help guide and support you through the journey and recommend potential introductions based on the characteristics that really matter. After all, how many times have you spoken to a friend who stated that they only find men over 6ft attractive only to find that the man they settle down with is only 5ft 9in. Or found yourself ruling somebody out because they are a few years outside your age range, only to find the perfect partner was a lot older but had the zest for life and get up and go that age subsequently became insignificant.

By being realistic when dating as to what is most important to you, you will find that your relationships are built on stronger foundations with values and aspirations that truly complement yourself and your lifestyle – giving you the best chance of success for that ultimate goal of a long-term committed relationship.

At Ignite Dating, our matchmakers use a unique mix of Myers Briggs personality profiling, intuition and expertise to match you with potential partners that have the values, aspirations and goals that you are looking for. We will introduce you to like-minded individuals that we believe will complement your lifestyle and open your eyes as to the most important aspects of your ideal partner – even if they’re not your usual type. If you’ve been chasing the same type of person for years now with no success and would like to try a new approach with experts to guide you throughout, then get in touch with our team today and let us help you find the right person for you.

More Blogs

Information on whether you're ready to date or not

Are you truly ready to date?

When it comes to dating – particularly after a bereavement, divorce or a long pause following a break-up – it can be confusing to know if you are truly ready to date again…well are you?

Read More »
The Best Luxury Date Ideas in London

Date ideas in the capital

As the capital of England and a major global city, it is no surprise that London has a lot to offer when it comes to activities to impress your date. Here is a small selection of some of the many options…

Read More »
Ideas for Spring Dating in Cheshire

Spring Dating in Cheshire

Whether you live in Manchester or the surrounding areas or simply fancy a change of scenery for your next date, this gorgeous county has plenty to offer for spring dating.

Read More »

Are you looking for love?

Subscribe to receive useful hints & tips to guide you on your dating journey…

By sending this form you have read and understood our Privacy Policy and terms of service.